The role of parents and family, in the future success of a person is more important than knowledge and skills learn at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The idea of becoming successful because of the guardian’s upbringing has more importance than getting
education
from institutions. I strongly agree with the statement and equally believe that the influence of elders over Add an article
an education
kids
leave
more impact on their life rather than school or college. In forthcoming paragraphs, I am going to elaborate Correct subject-verb agreement
leaves
it
in detail, Change preposition
on it
while
giving solid reasons to support my points of view.
Best
place to start early Correct article usage
The best
education
is considered to be home
. Parents
put a lot of effort on their children, so that they can teach them basic etiquettes
or manners about how to behave with anyone outside. Fix the agreement mistake
etiquette
In addition
to this
, mostly
mothers take the responsibility of educating their Correct your spelling
most
kids
from an early age,
Remove the comma
apply
while
doing other household work. For instance
, in a country like Pakistan parents
prefer to educate toddlers on their own at home
instead
of sending them to day care
centres. Correct your spelling
daycare
As a result
, they tend to be more mature by showing a good attitude towards others.
Achieving good grades and fabulous opportunities can also
be considered a positive point, provided that above
practice becomes the norm among caretakers. Learning knowledge at Correct article usage
the above
such
an early stage benefits them with
performing well in schools resulting in getting admission Change preposition
by
in
top colleges Change preposition
to
of
developed countries in future. One illustration of Change preposition
in
this
is in developing countries like Pakistan moving abroad for better education
is a common exercise among students. They have to study hard in order to get more information so they can do well in exams and accomplish
a high percentage. Verb problem
achieve
Furthermore
, kids
whose education
starts from an early age at home
by their parents
easily fulfil this
dream as compared to others.
On the contrary
, skills and other sets of knowledge can be learned in later parts of life. If someone wants to secure a proper job when they get older, they will have to be an expert in some specific field. However
, many academies and tuitions these days are providing service to individuals, so they can master such
areas of study. On the other hand
, person
can Fix the agreement mistake
people
also
learn about it in companies as well. Many big organizations are organizing workshops to polish youngsters
analytical thinking and make them ready for the coming days.
Change noun form
youngsters'
youngster's
To conclude
, learning knowledge from parents
at home
is more important than whatever they attain at school. From my perspective, studying at early centres is mandatory for everyone, whereas
no one can leave a better impression on kids
than their parents
. Because
Correct word choice
Parents
parents
develop the base of their kids
from early
Correct article usage
an early
ages
and guide them about basic manners Fix the agreement mistake
age
as well as
communication skills. However
, other things can be learned on
later stages as well.Change preposition
in
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Coherence & Cohesion
Develop paragraphs sufficiently with specific examples, with each paragraph focusing on one main idea. Ensure that examples are directly related to the question prompt, and provide clearer links between the role of parents and future success.
Task Response
While the position on the issue is clear, ensure that you address the full scope of the essay prompt by acknowledging the role of school education. Provide more analysis and comparison between the roles of family and school in shaping success.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical flow of ideas, use a range of cohesive devices more effectively, such as linking words, synonyms, and pronouns, to ensure the essay progresses smoothly from introduction to conclusion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example