In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you thinks this is a positive or negative situation.

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation

In some countries, there is a viewpoint that owning a

home

is more important than renting one. I think the reason causing

this

situation

Add a missing verb

is related

show examples

to many aspects,

such

as the national

culture

and policy.

Although

I think owning a

home

has advantages in many ways, I still hold a negative attitude towards

this

situation

because of the economic and social pressure

this

viewpoint has been leading. One of the reasons why

people

regarding buying a

home

is important is

culture

. China is a very typical example. In

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

history, a grand house is a presentation of status and wealth for individuals, and as the clan conception has been rooted deeply in

this

country in long term history,

people

tend to have a solid

residential

Replace the word

residence

show examples

for their potential growing family. Even today, many Chinese choose what is beneficial for a traditional family as a priority.

And

Correct word choice

Culture

show examples

culture

influences how

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society criticizes a person,

therefore

, there is a part of young citizens buying a

home

to run away from the pressure from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society and their relatives.And another reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

this

situation

is the policy of a nation.The

society

Change noun form

society's

show examples

lacks

Correct subject-verb agreement

lack

show examples

enough welfare would cause citizens’ insecurity. There are many

people

who believe that homeownership is the main source of security in China. If you own a

home

, you have a stable shelter, a renting

home

is not reliable. The reasons above have

Add a missing verb

had a

show examples

negative impact on China these years. The passion of

people

buying

home

Correct article usage

a home

show examples

increases the price of a

home

. The high expenditure on buying a

home

lowers the quality of

people

’s lives, and many of them have to work overtime to repay the debt. These can seriously harm citizen’s mental and physical health. In general, more

people

prefer owning a

home

influenced by the

culture

and welfare policy of the country, and

this

situation

is not a good sign because there are many negative effects

have

Correct pronoun usage

that have

show examples

been brought out.

Submitted by ffff815 on Fri Jan 19 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and follows a logical sequence. Use cohesive devices effectively to guide the reader through your argument.

introduction conclusion present

Provide a more comprehensive introduction to the topic that clearly outlines your essay's structure and argument. Conclude your essay effectively by summarizing your main points and restating your opinion.

supported main points

Support your main points with more specific examples and detailed explanations. This will make your argument stronger and more persuasive.

complete response

Fully develop your response to all parts of the task. Make sure you address why home ownership might be important and discuss its positive and negative aspects. Provide a balanced view if possible.

clear comprehensive ideas

Clarify and develop your ideas more comprehensively to avoid ambiguity. Use specific details and examples to articulate your points for greater clarity.

relevant specific examples

Incorporate more relevant examples to support your arguments. Ensure that your examples are specific and clearly linked to your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

321 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

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In some countries owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you thinks this is a positive or negative situation.

Fully explain your ideas

A big salary is more important. Do you agree or disagree?

A rise in the standard of living in a country often only seems to benefit cities rather than rural areas. What problems can this cause? How might these problems be reduced?

Some people believe that all wild animals should be protected. Others say that few wild animals should be protected instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.