Some people think that large international sporting events only brings drawbacks, and that it is not worth hosting them. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, there is an opinion that big
sports
tournaments are highly disadvantageous for countries where they are held.
However
, I totally disagree with
this
view, as these competitions make
people
closer to each other and promote tourism
to
Change preposition
in
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a
hosting
Replace the word
host
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country
. The main reason why I believe that
world
championships are important for hosts is because it raises
people
’s unity and may even make them leave their conflicts for some time.
For instance
, during the
World
Cup in Russia, the whole
country
turned into
the
Correct article usage
a
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territory, where
people
would forget about their disagreements and get together to support their team. Usually, when
such
events take place abroad, for many, a vast majority of
people
cannot afford to travel to cheer for their national athletes.
However
, when sportsmen compete at home, the cost of attendance is significantly lower.
Therefore
, more
people
can see it in real life and feel the atmosphere of a
sports
fest, which urges viewers to stay in peace and celebrate. Another reason to claim that global
sports
competitions are beneficial for their hosts is because
media
Correct article usage
the media
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present the
country
to the
world
and international fans popularize it. It happens mainly
due to
the fact that authorities allocate special funds to improve local tourist and
sports
infrastructure and encourage the population to be welcoming via different media channels.
Consequently
, after foreigners
got
Wrong verb form
get
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a chance to discover
completely
Correct article usage
a completely
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rebuilt environment
along with
smiling and friendly
people
, they come back home and
advice
Replace the word
advise
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their friends to visit
this
venue.
For instance
, the quantity of tourists to Russia has tripled since it hosted the Winter Olympics and the FIFA
World
Cup. In conclusion, in my opinion,
world
sports
competitions are of utmost importance for their hosts, because
this
way they can get their
country
to be advertised globally and ease internal conflicts and dissatisfaction among locals.
Submitted by d.i.kuprin on

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task achievement
Maintain a clear position throughout the response. You've managed this well by stating your disagreement in the introduction and reinforcing it throughout.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing to organize ideas clearly. While you have achieved logical structure, introducing more variety could enhance this.
coherence cohesion
Include a richer variety of sentence structures to demonstrate linguistic range, while remaining clear and error-free.
coherence cohesion
In your conclusion, succinctly summarize the arguments presented instead of introducing new ideas.
task achievement
Support main points with relevant details and develop them further for a higher score; the use of specific examples is good but can be even more detailed.
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