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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below shows the number of tourists visting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where revelant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where revelant.
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The given graph depicts the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
tourists
Use synonyms
 who visited the Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 whether staying on
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
 or on the
island
Use synonyms
 from 2010 to 2017
Overall
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, the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
tourists
Use synonyms
 increased noticeably throughout the given years.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the figures of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who stayed on
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
 replaced from the least to the most popular.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 2010, the quality of
tourists
Use synonyms
 who stayed on
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
 and on the
island
Use synonyms
 was 0.1
million
Use synonyms
 and above 0.5
million
Use synonyms
 respectively. These figures rose until 2013
which
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
 on the
island
Use synonyms
 remained stable for the next two years at 1,5
million
Use synonyms
 after that dropped by 0.5
million
Use synonyms
tourists
Use synonyms
 in 2016 before hitting a peak of 1,5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2017.
In contrast
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, visitor numbers who preferred to stay on the
cruise
Use synonyms
 continuously grew over the period and reached 2
million
Use synonyms
 in 2017. The total
number
Use synonyms
 of Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
 was one
million
Use synonyms
 in 2010.
This
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number
Use synonyms
 went up by .5
million
Use synonyms
 yearly and hit a high of 3.5
million
Use synonyms
tourists
Use synonyms
 in 2017. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 at the beginning of the period, the majority of the
island
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
 preferred staying on the
island
Use synonyms
, it was replaced by staying on
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period.

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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, tourists, island, cruise, ships, visitors, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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