IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some
people
Use synonyms
 think that doctors and engineers should stay at home and must practice their
skills
Use synonyms
 in their
country
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others argue that they must work independently all over the world.In my opinion,I think professionals should follow their dreams and do jobs where they like. On the one hand, a lot of
people
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 say that practising your
skills
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 in your area is the best thing
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that it will help you to improve bonding with neighbours.
Moreover
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, it will help your
country
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 economically,because more skilled
people
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 create more money.
In addition
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, a professional person can support their
parents
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 because he or she lives closer to their
parents
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,
For example
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, if a professional's
parents
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 are sick,they can go there and support their
parents
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 as much as possible.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 argue that skill seekers should explore their
skills
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,which is why they should go abroad if needed.If
people
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 get a better job offer from another
country
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 they must grab it because it will boost their
skills
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.Maximum time another
country
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 job offers better living standard and better salary, in one word better life.
Additionally
Linking Words
, if a person sends money to their family,it will increase his or her
country
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's wealth.
In other words
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, can support their
parents
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 financially.
For instance
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,in recent times remittance has come to Bangladesh from abroad and it boosted their economy very quickly . In conclusion, I believe that better opportunities are helpful to improve one's life because they will help
people
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 to improve financially and mentally.
Otherwise
Linking Words
,if he or she misses the opportunity it can be frustrating.

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Task Achievement
Work on providing specific, real-world examples to support your points. Your essay mentions general scenarios, but adding detailed examples can strengthen your argument.
Task Achievement
Clarify your position from the beginning and maintain consistency throughout your essay. While you do provide an opinion, reinforcing it across various sections can make your stance clearer.
Coherence and Cohesion
Focus on improving your essay structure by properly organizing your paragraphs. Consider introducing your topic, then discussing each view in separate paragraphs, and finally, providing your personal opinion in the conclusion for a more logical flow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Increase the variety of linking words used to connect ideas within and across paragraphs. This will enhance the readability of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Pay attention to punctuation and sentence structures to improve readability and coherence. Avoid run-on sentences and incorporate a wider range of sentence structures for complexity.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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