Nowadays many elderly people are living alone and this can cause a variety of problems. What are some of these problems, and what solutions can you suggest?
In recent times, various issues have arisen among independent elderly citizens. In my opinion, I think
this
behaviour causes mental and physical health difficulties, and the authorities should collaborate with the private sector to provide accessible resources to address these matters.
To begin
with, isolation can lead to mental health problems such
as depression. This
is owing to the fact that people with this
practice do not have others to share their problems with, interact with, and get motivation from, leading to believe their life is worthless and no longer have an interest in continuing it. For example
, a recent study by the Indonesian Psychology Institution discovered that more than 50% of individuals who do not have any family relationships have suffered from depression.
Additionally
, medical condition risks might increase for the lonely elderly. This
is due to
the fact that they lack assistance in daily activities and emergencies. Consequently
, it can be difficult for them to go to the hospital for a health examination. For instance
, the American Heart Association has discovered that heart attacks kill more than 1 million people every year, and the majority of them do not receive an immediate response. This
condition is likely to happen for those who do not have anyone to help in such
a moment.
To overcome these issues, the government and private sectors should establish collaboration to subsidize services for the elderly, making them more accessible and affordable. This
policy can provide safety measures for them since it can support daily activities and encourage communal interaction among them, resulting in increased personal care and civil life.
In conclusion, disconnected individuals may increase cause them medical conditions; thus
, the policy to grant them access to social and physical services should be established by authorities with the help of private institutions.Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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Task Achievement
Expand and clarify your ideas further in the body paragraphs by discussing how specific measures can particularly benefit the elderly. For example, suggest specific programs or services that could help alleviate loneliness and medical risks.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider introducing a wider variety of transitional phrases and connective words to improve the flow of your essay. This will help in making the progression of your arguments clearer and more nuanced.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a clear distinction between ideas in paragraphs by using topic sentences more effectively. This will strengthen the organization of your essay and make your main points more explicit to the reader.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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