In many modern societies, grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with their grandparents. Why do you think this is? What are the consequences of this trend?

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People

arguably

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that the grandchildren seldom have spare time with their grandparents these days. In

this

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essay, I will explain

about

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my perspectives and the consequences of

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issue. As far as I am concerned, modern society tends to have occupations in the

center

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of the business district rather than in rural or village areas. It is likely to happen because after they graduate, big cities often offer a variety of opportunities in different vacancies.

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, when they decide to have a family, the millennial is relocated from their parent’s house to a city

that is

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close to their workplace.

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, after giving birth, most grandchildren rarely see their ancestors

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their parents’ packed schedule, and long distance which makes it hard to visit them. Long distance relationships,

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, create a gap between the oldster and their grandbabies which could make them avoidant because of lack of bonding.

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, couples nowadays prefer sending their kids to the playground

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of playing with their relatives.

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, people in society think that high technology seems more convenient to get in touch with grandparents via video calls, voice calls, and social media.

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, the concept of contemporary tech could not replace the real connection in human emotion. The lack of appreciation brings

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issue into one of the example risks from the trend.

To conclude

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, I believe that couples and their parents should cooperate in terms of making conjunctions between their kids. In order to less misunderstanding and more conflicts in the future.

wulandarianggietaFri Feb 16 2024

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Introduction and Conclusion

Ensure a clear introduction that delineates the essay's direction, and a conclusion that succinctly summarizes the main points and provides a final perspective.

Coherence and Cohesion

Organize your essay more coherently with clear paragraphs, each one should deal with a specific aspect of the question. Use a range of cohesive devices effectively to help navigate the reader through your argument.

Task Achievement

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Lexical Resource

Integrate more varied and precise vocabulary to better express your ideas. Aim to use less common and more academic vocabulary, and pay attention to accurate word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
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detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

nuclear families
extended family members
digital communication
geographical mobility
extracurricular activities
integenerational communication
family history
cultural heritage
emotional support
life advice
social interaction
mental and emotional well-being

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