Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
The majority are taking different remedies without the suggestions of any specialists;
however
, sometimes they can be useful, but there are many chances of major infections occurring. In Linking Words
this
essay, I will explain both sides' perspectives and my Linking Words
overall
opinion.
On the one hand, taking drugs without a doctor's consultation can be harmful for one's health; it not only affects anyone’s health but Linking Words
also
leads to serious diseases Linking Words
such
as cancer, asthma, and psychological issues as well. Linking Words
For instance
, people who have fevor definitely do not recognise the reasons for Linking Words
this
without tests, and in Linking Words
this
case, if they decide to take medicines, which are generally recommended for different problems, it will affect them negatively Linking Words
instead
of curing them.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, there are some people who opt to take drugs Linking Words
according to
their own knowledge. Linking Words
This
is because they are concerned about their money. To be more precise, the poor masses have to maintain a balance between their daily needs, including the cost of their children's studies, and these require most of their earnings. Linking Words
Therefore
, in terms of physical issues, it is not taken as a considerable issue Linking Words
due to
the other responsibilities to their family Linking Words
as well as
society. Linking Words
Hence
, they decide to choose alternative paths Linking Words
instead
of going to hospitals, as it can provide short-term relief.
Linking Words
To conclude
, despite some arguments, it must be said that Linking Words
this
problem has no easy solutions. People are already devoted to alternative medicines; Linking Words
consequently
, Linking Words
this
trend can lead to serious problems in society.Linking Words
Submitted by saimonsohan121 on
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Task Achievement
Work on integrating more precise and varied examples to substantiate your points. Though you've touched on the topic, more specific instances could add weight and clarity to your arguments.
Language
Consider revising your essay for grammatical accuracy and vocabulary range. This will not only improve readability but also better convey your arguments and enhance your overall score.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve your essay's structure by making your introduction and conclusion stronger and clearer. Clearly state your opinion in the introduction and succinctly summarize it in the conclusion, alongside a brief recap of your main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
In your main body paragraphs, ensure that each paragraph centers on a single main idea. Use clear topic sentences to introduce these ideas, and follow them with supporting sentences that elaborate on these points with examples or further explanation.