Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority are taking different remedies without the suggestions of any specialists;
however
Linking Words
, sometimes they can be useful, but there are many chances of major infections occurring. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will explain both sides' perspectives and my
overall
Linking Words
opinion. On the one hand, taking drugs without a doctor's consultation can be harmful for one's health; it not only affects anyone’s health but
also
Linking Words
leads to serious diseases
such
Linking Words
as cancer, asthma, and psychological issues as well.
For instance
Linking Words
, people who have fevor definitely do not recognise the reasons for
this
Linking Words
without tests, and in
this
Linking Words
case, if they decide to take medicines, which are generally recommended for different problems, it will affect them negatively
instead
Linking Words
of curing them.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some people who opt to take drugs
according to
Linking Words
their own knowledge.
This
Linking Words
is because they are concerned about their money. To be more precise, the poor masses have to maintain a balance between their daily needs, including the cost of their children's studies, and these require most of their earnings.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in terms of physical issues, it is not taken as a considerable issue
due to
Linking Words
the other responsibilities to their family
as well as
Linking Words
society.
Hence
Linking Words
, they decide to choose alternative paths
instead
Linking Words
of going to hospitals, as it can provide short-term relief.
To conclude
Linking Words
, despite some arguments, it must be said that
this
Linking Words
problem has no easy solutions. People are already devoted to alternative medicines;
consequently
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
trend can lead to serious problems in society.
Submitted by saimonsohan121 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Work on integrating more precise and varied examples to substantiate your points. Though you've touched on the topic, more specific instances could add weight and clarity to your arguments.
Language
Consider revising your essay for grammatical accuracy and vocabulary range. This will not only improve readability but also better convey your arguments and enhance your overall score.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve your essay's structure by making your introduction and conclusion stronger and clearer. Clearly state your opinion in the introduction and succinctly summarize it in the conclusion, alongside a brief recap of your main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
In your main body paragraphs, ensure that each paragraph centers on a single main idea. Use clear topic sentences to introduce these ideas, and follow them with supporting sentences that elaborate on these points with examples or further explanation.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: