Some people think that secondary school children should study international news as one of the school subjects. Other people think that it is a waste of valuable school ti. me. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
To
servive
in Correct your spelling
survive
service
this
internationally linked world, many people have the opinion that Linking Words
students
should learn about the major events which have been happening in the world by introducing a new subject into the official academic curriculum. Use synonyms
However
, others insist that young Linking Words
students
are already fully occupied with existing subjects Use synonyms
such
as math, science, and additional languages which I Linking Words
also
agree with.
Some individuals would acknowledge that Linking Words
students
should learn the international Use synonyms
major
events and issues to build up their capabilities to accept which is based on worldwide knowledge. Introducing the new subject as the office procedure to teach Correct word choice
apply
students
international Use synonyms
news
can support them in increasing their comprehension of the effects of other countries' issues. As Use synonyms
students
might not be able to select the appropriate information from the internet by themselves, it would be greatly helpful for them to be prepared as competent international human resources by having a qualified guide from their teachers.
Despite Use synonyms
this
argument, the opposite side of people Linking Words
support
that having additional subjects like learning international Change the verb form
supports
news
would bring more burden on young people as they are already full of other academic works Use synonyms
such
as science, additional languages, and mathematics. As Linking Words
this
is the fact Linking Words
thatstudents
have been experiencing excessive academic stress with the current curriculum, adding more study will result in unhealthy psychological conditions for Correct your spelling
that students
students
. Use synonyms
On the other hand
, it would be challenging for teachers to choose the Linking Words
news
which will be just based on teachers' own perspectives regarding politics, religion, and other personal beliefs. Use synonyms
Students
can be affected by the teacher's opinion prior to developing their own viewpoints.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
although
Linking Words
students
can be equipped with instant international knowledge by learning worldwide Use synonyms
news
, it cannot be ignored that Use synonyms
students
might have greater stress with having extracurricular activities on top of what they are already allocated to study. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, there would be a risk of installing the teacher's personal viewpoints into the Linking Words
students
before they establish their own views to see the issues which I am completely convinced with.Use synonyms
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Introduction
Ensure that your essay begins with a clear introduction that outlines the topic and previews the main points you will discuss. While this has been done satisfactorily, refining your thesis statement to more clearly present your stance can enhance clarity.
Body Paragraphs
In the body paragraphs, make sure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. Use topic sentences effectively to introduce each point, followed by supporting details and examples. While you have structured your essay well, incorporating more specific examples to support your arguments could further strengthen your essay.
Conclusion
Conclude your essay with a succinct conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion in light of the discussion. Your conclusion does this effectively, but be careful not to introduce new information that wasn’t discussed in the body of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve coherence by using a variety of linking words and phrases to show the relationship between ideas within and between paragraphs. You’ve used some linking devices, but increasing their variety and accuracy can make your essay flow more smoothly.
Task Achievement
To better achieve the task, ensure that your essay thoroughly addresses all parts of the prompt. While you have discussed both views and your opinion, incorporating more detailed examples related to international news and its impact could provide a more robust response.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.