IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Are higher taxes or lower taxes better for society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In the modern world taxation is an important policy for many countries. It can improve
people
Use synonyms
's lives. Which is managed by the government.
For example
Linking Words
, improve public transportation.
However
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, higher
taxes
Use synonyms
 pay are impact to income of
people
Use synonyms
. I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages and that can enhance the services and public facilities for a better life for
people
Use synonyms
.
To begin
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 with, when
people
Use synonyms
 pay higher
taxes
Use synonyms
 they contribute to the government budget to improve many services
such
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 as improve education system and facilities. In some countries, they managed tax budgets to solve their problems.
For instance
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, Japan enhanced its public health care to solve problems of an Aging society.
Moreover
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, in the case of the USA, they recruit many soldiers for the army by providing many welfare benefits to their soldiers.
Therefore
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 paying higher
taxes
Use synonyms
 that better for the country.
In addition
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, reducing income inequality for many
people
Use synonyms
. Because it can share the benefits
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 using
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 same facilities or services. Providing potential to them for
educate
Replace the word
education
show examples
 and get
a jobs
Correct the article-noun agreement
a job
jobs
show examples
.
Furthermore
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, in
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of economics
that
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 can improve
GDP
Correct article usage
the GDP
show examples
 of
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
 by
encourage
Change the verb form
encouraging
show examples
 industry for investment.
For
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example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
according to
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 the information
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
I read on the internet, Japan
generate
Wrong verb form
generated
show examples
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 industry from hydrogen technology investment. Which is
get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
funded by
government
Correct article usage
a government
show examples
 tax
2000
Change preposition
of 2000
show examples
 million dollars.
To conclude
Linking Words
, lower
taxes
Use synonyms
better
Add a missing verb
are better
show examples
 for
people
Use synonyms
, as
people
Use synonyms
 can save money in their bank accounts.
However
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, they must
lost
Change the verb form
lose
be lost
show examples
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
 for the public
such
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 as
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
 their
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
 education system.

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Task Achievement
Clarify your thesis statement at the beginning to immediately make known your stance on the issue. This will provide a clear roadmap for the rest of the essay.
Task Achievement
Ensure your essay directly addresses the prompt. Discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of higher taxes, making your position clear.
Task Achievement
Make sure your conclusion succinctly summarizes your main arguments and clearly states your position instead of introducing new contrasting ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use paragraphs effectively to organize your arguments. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea supported by explanations, evidence, or examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
Connect your ideas more clearly using linking words and phrases (e.g., Moreover, Therefore, However) to show the relationship between paragraphs and within paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Avoid grammatical errors and improve sentence structure for clarity. Accurate use of grammar and varied sentence structures can enhance the readability of your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • public services
  • infrastructure
  • disposable income
  • economic growth
  • job creation
  • income inequality
  • redistributive policies
  • equitable
  • disparities
  • stifle
  • innovation
  • burdensome
  • dynamic
  • competitive
  • efficiency
  • administration
  • tax collection
  • wastage
  • disadvantages
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