Working parents strive to achieve a balance between career and family, but only a few manage to achieve it. What is the reason according to you? Discuss possible solutions and provide examples.

This
is a really argumentative matter that fathers and mothers who are working and attempt to create coordination between work and family
while
some of them can not do it successfully, some of them which are a small number of them can do it. The causes of
this
matter are
firstly
, overwhelming parents when start working. When humans start doing something new and add it to their real life it is hard to manage everything as they do in past.
For example
, a mother who has two children and decides to start working can not do all of the stuff she had been doing because of that she is not even able to manage everything together.
Secondly
, not have good planning to manage all of duty. It means that if parents do not have a program for managing time and energy between their jobs and family, they cannot have a balance in their family life.
For example
, a family who
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
working and has no plan for everyone after work absolutely just gets rest and even takes a nap which is not helpful for the family. Solutions for solving
this
issue are first of all, creating a program for having harmony between family and career which means that families must have a plan for their time to be able to manage everything on their jobs.
Secondly
, using the times that are low and dead for spending time with families with each other.
For example
, they can go out together for simple things like shopping and going to the cinema, park and trips which are one day. it can help them improve their relationships after work. In the bottom line, families can manage easily their jobs and relationships if they have a good plan;
However
, it can be a bit hard at first but with trying it can happen.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Work on a more precise thesis statement in the introduction to clearly state your main argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs for better coherence.
task achievement
Elaborate more on your examples to provide a clearer connection to your main points.
coherence cohesion
Vary your sentence structures and use more transitional phrases to enhance cohesion.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task prompt and provides relevant arguments and solutions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • time management
  • support systems
  • childcare
  • traditional gender roles
  • societal expectations
  • financial stability
  • flexible working hours
  • remote work options
  • burnout
What to do next:
Look at other essays: