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Writing Samples
Band 7

In developing countries, some people think governments should introduce new technology for people in order to improve the quality of life, while others believe governments should offer free education. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#countries #people #governments #technology #quality #life #offer #education
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In developing
countries
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, some
people
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 believe that life quality can be improved by adding new technology,
while
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 others argue that free education should be provided by governments. Saving time and having more graduates can be some of the positive sides of those opinions. I believe they both have pros. Improving technology can be of great help to society.
Firstly
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, it helps
people
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 save time researching.
For example
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, with the advancement of the internet came Google, which is the biggest tool to search for information, anything can be found in it. Google makes information
searching
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search
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 faster than ever before with a simple click. In previous times,
people
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 needed to go to libraries and waste a lot of time checking through books to find the information they were searching for. 
On the other hand
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, free education can be of extreme importance to communities. Some developing
countries
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 cannot find the right professionals to do the job. University courses,
such
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 as law, medicine, dentistry, and some others, have high annual fees.
Therefore
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, if made available for free by the government, more
people
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 would be able to join those courses.
Consequently
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, more professionals will be available in the community.
Thus
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, increasing the chances of the country becoming more developed.  In my opinion, both ideas bring important aspects to developing
countries
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, each with its own pros.
However
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, it would be up to each country to prioritise whichever investment would be more useful for them. In conclusion, the implementation of new technology and free education are seen as themes of debate
for
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in
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 some
countries
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.
However
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, governments need to work with the population to find what it is that their
countries
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 really need to be provided with.
Submitted by leandro-vs- on

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Task Achievement
To improve your score in task achievement, ensure you address all parts of the task equally. This means discussing both views and your own opinion with a balanced approach. Providing more specific examples for each view will enrich your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, aim to improve the flow between ideas by using a variety of linking words and phrases. Also, ensuring paragraphs are well-structured with a clear main idea can enhance readability and coherence.
General Advice
In developing your arguments, rely on more specific and varied examples. This will strengthen your position and ensure your essay is engaging and informative.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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