Some people think that sport has significant impact on the society, others think that sport is nothing more than a leisure activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People
have opposing views about the role of
sport
in
society
, with some deeming it as no more than a pastime,
while
others
considering
Wrong verb form
consider
show examples
it as an essential field bringing numerous benefits. In
this
essay, I will discuss both perspectives and agree with the latter. On the one hand, those who argue that the role of
sport
is limited to a leisure pursuit have a valid reason to support their claim. Supporters say that
people
these days have very limited
time
to devote to
sports
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because they are preoccupied with other responsibilities,
such
as work and studies.
This
means that they can only go to the gym, do
sports
, ranging from table tennis to football, and generally do exercises only when the
time
allows, probably during the weekends.
Consequently
, it would be wrong to assume that
sports
have an important part to play in
society
, as
people
are spending negligible amounts of
time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
staying active, which is
in contrast
to professional training that requires dedication, effort and
time
.
Nevertheless
, I agree with those who believe that
sport
is integral
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
society
for various reasons. First of all, it is a means of motivating the younger generation to achieve their dreams. These days millions of youngsters look up to well-known athletes,
such
as Khabib Nurmagomedov and Cristiano Ronaldo,
due to
their admirable sporting feats and successful life paths. These sportspeople serve as role models for the youth who can be lost in life and don't know who they want to be. The
second,
albeit equally significant, benefit of
sport
is that it is a way of maintaining public health. Even if
people
are spending too little
time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
doing
sports
, as long as they keep doing so consistently, they reduce the risk of serious health problems like
hearth
Correct your spelling
heart
show examples
attacks.
While
these
sport
amateurs regard their activity as a pastime, the benefits extend well beyond
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nurturing a healthy
society
. In conclusion,
although
some individuals consider
sport
to be an unimportant field in
society
, reducing its importance to a mere leisure activity, others, including me, take issue with these
people
, as
sport
can be a means of motivating the youth and enhancing public well-being.
Submitted by ina1_95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that you specifically address the prompt by discussing both views in detail and giving a clear, well-developed opinion. Incorporate a wider range of examples and details to support your ideas more extensively.
Coherence
Improve coherence by making smoother transitions between paragraphs. While your essay has a good structure, using more varied transitional phrases can ensure a smoother flow of ideas.
Cohesion
To boost cohesion, work on linking sentences more effectively within paragraphs. This can be done by using cohesive devices like pronouns and conjunctions to make your argument more interconnected.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fosters
  • national pride
  • integration
  • mutual respect
  • advocate for equality
  • influencing societal attitudes
  • leisure activity
  • physical and mental health benefits
  • commercialization
  • catalyst for unity
  • societal impact
  • multifaceted role
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!