Obesity was once considered a disease of adults; however, it is becoming increasingly common among children. Why do you think this is happening? What can be done to help children stay healthy?

#obesity #disease #adults #children

Non-communicable diseases like

obesity

are increasingly common both in adults and

children

. I believe that there are many contributing factors to why it

also

affects

children

. Nowadays,

youngsters

are eating too much

food

in their daily lives leading to

obesity

at an early age. We often hear that

children

have to eat a lot because they are still growing.

However

this

can be a misconception because they might end up eating too much

food

Children

still lack self-discipline and they do not know about the side effects of overeating.

Moreover

, when adults give them some

food

, especially junk

food

, they will tend to accept it with pleasure.

Thus

this

will increase the prevalence of

obesity

not only among adults but

also

among

youngsters

. There are many ways that can be done to help

youngsters

stay healthy and decrease the prevalence of

obesity

Firstly

, I believe that educating parents is necessary to increase awareness about the

food

intake of their

children

. If parents are already aware of the foods that they give to their

children

, it will decrease the possibility of

youngsters

eating too much

food

Secondly

, early screening of

youngsters

is needed because it can prevent long-term health complications.

For instance

, obese

children

will have a higher chance of getting several diseases

such

as diabetes and cardiovascular disease. With the help of early screening, doctors can give various prevention actions that can be given to

children

Moreover

, parents

also

can get additional knowledge about the condition of their

children

To sum up

, obese

children

are more prevalent nowadays

due to

the assumption that

children

must eat a lot.

However

, I am firmly convinced that with the help of education and early screening,

obesity

can be prevented from an early age.

Submitted by tiana29.alisjahbana on Tue Mar 19 2024

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such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Obesity was once considered a disease of adults; however, it is becoming increasingly common among children. Why do you think this is happening? What can be done to help children stay healthy?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that the government should establish free libraries in each town. Others, however, believe that it is a waste of money since the public can use the Internet at home to obtain information. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

When ask to choose between a life without work and working most of the time, people would always choose not to work. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that teachers are no longer needed because students can study via the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With the rise of E-books comes the decline in paper books. Some people see this as a good steps forward while others do not. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

In many countries are investing new technology to deal with the public. Why it is happening? Do you think it is an appropriate use of goverment money?