Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are health benefits of living in cities. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

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There are two opinions about where
health
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is better. One is in the
countryside
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.And second is in rural
areas
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.
Although
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in the
countryside
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health
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is better because of the fresh air, in cities better due there are great medical services.
On the other hand
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, when people live in urban
areas
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, they have better healthier lifestyles for a of variety
reasons
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.First of all, there is fresh air which is extremely good for their lungs.
Secondly
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, they have products which are all without chemicals and it great for their digestion.
For example
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, it is believed that
countryside
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residents have the smallest percentage of lung problems and digestion problems .
Thus
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for these
reasons
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Add a comma
,
show examples
urban
areas
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could have a better healthy lifestyle.
On the other hand
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, there are many
reasons
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for why
health
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benefits of living in cities.The main reason is that there are great medical services which give people
health
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care and effective treatment by professional doctors.
For instance
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, if they live in rural
areas
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, they will have daily check-outs with doctors in hospitals and
also
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immediate solutions to the disease.
Therefore
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for these
reasons
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, it could be great to live in urban
areas
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for a healthy lifestyle. In conclusion, living in rural
areas
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for a better healthy lifestyle can be better
due to
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medical services but I personally think that living in urban
areas
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is more beneficial for people’s
health
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as the
countryside
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has fresh air and natural food sources.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a distinct point and that these points are clearly related to the topic.
task achievement
Use more specific examples or data to support your points for a stronger argument.
task achievement
Check for consistent use of terms like 'urban' and 'rural' to avoid confusion.
task achievement
Improve the variety of vocabulary to increase clarity and interest in your essay.
introduction conclusion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, covering both views.
logical structure
Each paragraph addresses a specific viewpoint in the discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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