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Writing Samples
Band 8

In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for the government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Fast
food
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 is getting more and more popular in some nations.
Thus
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, the amount of
people
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 who are considered overweight is growing. Some
people
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 opine that authorities should put taxes on those foods. I agree with
this
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 point of view wholeheartedly and I will explain why in the following paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, obesity is a very serious problem and we need to cope with it as soon as possible. When I was a kid, only a few
of
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apply
show examples
people
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 looked chubby. Currently, fat
people
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 are everywhere. It is terrible! What is the main factor of
this
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 problem? I believe fast
food
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 contributes to
this
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 the most. Fast
food
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such
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 as fried chicken, hamburgers, french fries and so on are quite delicious and
people
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 all over the world are crazy about them.
However
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, those foods are unhealthy for human beings, and it is not a good idea to order them fairly often. In my perspective, putting taxes on junk
food
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 is a good idea so that we can reduce our desire to eat them and governments can earn more money from
this
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 policy, killing two birds with one stone.
Otherwise
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, more and more
people
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 are facing weight gain problems.
People
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 who are overweight usually have so many problems
such
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 as high blood pressure, heart attack, moving slowly, and the like.
Therefore
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, it is not good for our bodies. In a nutshell, using taxes to stop fast
food
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 eating is a good concept, because eating those are detrimental. We may cause many diseases if we eat a lot lot of them and eat them very often.

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Language Use
To further enrich your essay, consider incorporating a wider range of vocabulary and complex sentence structures. This will showcase your language proficiency more prominently.
Supporting Examples
Although your argument is strong, adding more specific examples and data could make your position even more compelling. For instance, mentioning studies that support the direct correlation between fast food consumption and health issues could reinforce your argument.
Argument Depth
Remember to balance your discussion by considering counterarguments. This shows critical thinking and a comprehensive understanding of the topic. You could briefly mention potential drawbacks of taxing fast food and then refute these arguments to strengthen your stance.
Structure
Your essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a conclusive summary, making your argument easy to follow.
Task Response
You have effectively addressed the task, presenting a clear opinion and thoroughly arguing in support of imposing taxes on fast food to tackle obesity. Your position is consistent throughout the essay.
Engagement
Your use of personal anecdotes and general examples helps make your argument relatable and persuasive, suggesting a good understanding of the topic and its implications.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Overconsumption
  • Chronic diseases
  • Obesity
  • Diabetes
  • Cardiovascular health
  • Sin tax
  • Subsidize
  • Affordability
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Paternalism
  • Socio-economic disparities
  • Industry lobbying
  • Public health initiatives
  • Consumer behavior
  • Regulatory measures
  • Health-conscious
  • Processed foods
  • Fiscal policy
  • Preventative healthcare
  • Behavioral economics
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