In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, the global
population
is experiencing a noticeable increase in life expectancy, particularly among the elderly demographic. While
some argue that the growth of ageing individuals
may pose a challenge, others contend that it brings drawbacks. In my view, I believe the advantages of the rising elderly population
outweigh the disadvantages, and this
will be discussed in the following paragraphs.
On one hand, there are significant benefits both in developing and developed nations. Nevertheless
, ageing people not only possess valuable skills and experiences but also
have portable investments. For example
, the Taiwanese government has proactively extended the retirement age of elderly individuals
to address the workforce shortage. It is evident that the rising number
of the ageing population
indeed bolsters the labour force and stimulates economic growth. Therefore
, the growth of the elderly populace fosters the overall
economy.
On the other hand
, the increasing number
of ageing people brings negative consequences. For instance
, Taiwan has recently encountered challenges due to
its increasing elderly population
, resulting in strains on healthcare systems and caregiver burdens. It is not only Taiwan but the entire world that must address these issues effectively to achieve a balanced society. Thus
, the growing number
of elderly individuals
may pose worldwide hurdles and evolve into complicated solutions.
In conclusion, while
the growing elderly populace presents both advantages and disadvantages, I firmly advocate that the benefits of increasing the number
of elderly individuals
outweigh the drawbacks. It is imperative for governments to tackle these obstacles effectively and strive for societal equilibrium.Submitted by aa0963178783 on
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task response
Although the essay presents a balanced discussion between the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population, it's essential to further develop your examples to provide more depth to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to ensure a more varied use of connectives to make your argumentation smoother and your ideas more clearly connected.
task response
The essay effectively addresses the topic and provides a clear opinion, demonstrating good task response.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly defined, making your position and summary of the argument accessible to the reader.
task response
You've made a commendable effort in providing examples to support your main points.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...
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