Many teenagers believe becoming social media influencers is a good career choice. However, others argue that there are some major drawbacks related to an influencer career.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Social
media
has exploded since 2003. In the modern era, social
media
sites are not only the
platforms
that we communicating with friends or checking
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
in the morning, but
also
generate new
occupation
Fix the agreement mistake
occupations
show examples
such
as
content
creator
Fix the agreement mistake
creators
show examples
and influencers which is one of the most
popularity
Replace the word
popular
show examples
vocation. Becoming a social
media
influencer is considered an advantage for job occasions by many teenagers,
whereas
other section of people
believes
Correct subject-verb agreement
believe
show examples
that has detrimental
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
related to
this
career path.
This
article will explore
impact
Add an article
the impact
show examples
of social
media
influencers by providing perspectives on the positive aspect. There is a significant amount of evidence that supports the notion of social
media
being a benefit for job
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
. In
generation
Capitalize word
Generation
show examples
Z— people
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
age 11 – 26 years old— is undeniable that everyone has
account
Add an article
an account
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
many popular
platforms
such
as Facebook, Instagram and YouTube. These various channels can give a prospect for gaining income.
For example
, if you were
famous
Correct article usage
a famous
show examples
content
creator
on TikTok, doing
vlog
Add an article
a vlog
show examples
: one day with me at school or cover dance, you would
got
Change the verb form
get
show examples
contact
Wrong verb form
contacted
show examples
by
company
Add an article
a company
the company
show examples
asking to promote their product. These can be one way to build money in
account
Correct article usage
an account
show examples
.
Consequently
, teenagers are able to earn money in order to improve
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
aspect of their life
such
as
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
oversea
Correct your spelling
overseas
show examples
or
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
a good quality of life.
Moreover
, being
content
Correct article usage
a content
show examples
creator
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
show examples
both many
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
— creativity, public speaking, and communication skills— and self-discovery by
array
Add an article
an array
the array
show examples
of
content
— cooking, beauty blogger, and fashion. Social
media
sites give a lot of
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
to
be thrive
Change the verb form
thrive
show examples
in their life.
However
, it is true that there are some disadvantages,
for
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
publish
Wrong verb form
publishing
show examples
online
content
as
content
creators
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
also
has a response either positive
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
negative; in
particularly
Change the word
particular
show examples
negative online
content
can affect
cyber bullying
Correct your spelling
cyberbullying
show examples
or self-esteem. In conclusion,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
and social
media
platforms
have opened multiple doors in excellent occupation
prospect
Fix the agreement mistake
prospects
show examples
, helping teenagers
for acquiring
Wrong verb form
acquire
show examples
revenue by being
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
content
creator
Fix the agreement mistake
creators
show examples
and improving some
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.
As a result
, these
platforms
provide youngsters
to have
Verb problem
with
show examples
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
better well-being.
Submitted by fahsaichumteerathum on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure
Try to use a more diverse range of sentence structures to enhance clarity and readability.
Grammar
Proofread to catch and correct minor grammatical errors and typos, as these can slightly distract from the message being conveyed.
Transition
Incorporate transitional phrases more effectively to ensure a smoother flow between ideas and paragraphs.
Introduction/Conclusion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are both clear and succinct, summarizing your stance and the key points discussed.
Argument Balance
Provide balanced perspectives when discussing arguments, particularly if the essay topic suggests examining both sides of an argument.
Examples
You’ve effectively used specific examples to support your arguments, which greatly strengthens your essay.
Understanding
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents a clear stance, which is commendable.
Support
The main points are well-supported and contribute to a coherent argument throughout the essay.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: