Nowadays, people of all ages from certain parts of the world spend most time at home rather than going outdoors. Discuss the reasons, is this negative or positive development?

#people #ages #parts #world #time #home #development

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Nowadays, all the citizens from specific parts of the earth choose to spend their time in their locations rather than outdoors, I think

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change is generally negative because gradually we will lose our sense and responsibility for nature and our surroundings will disappear.

To begin

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with, thanks to technology

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generation does not need extra efforts to find what they want, all your needs will be satisfied just with some clicks.

As a result

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, they are completely safe and convenient in their location so they do not find any point in searching out the earth.

For example

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, some inventions

such

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as VR are giving fascinating experiences to their users and they can simply go through any possibility without any risks and extra consequences.

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, in modern cities there are all kinds of problems

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as air, noise, and traffic and people find it much more demanding to go out and be in touch with the world.

On the other hand

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, all of us are part of nature and to be human we need to find out about our community so it is vital to go out and upgrade our sense of responsibility to our countries because at first our global were captured by jungles and lakes and we changed it to

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polluted area.

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, I agree it is a frustrating process to change our world and being in our safe zone is more convenient,

although

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if we do not repair it in the near future we will have to deal with catastrophic effects. In conclusion, seems

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generation considers being in their homes and avoiding going outside it. I believe

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method is simple ,

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, we have to go out and find out our communities' issues and solve them gradually because if we do not do

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in the long term our world we be destroyed

Submitted by soroushnorouzi0478 on Sat Apr 06 2024

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General Language Use

Work on diversifying your sentence structures to enhance readability and demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.

Task Achievement

Consider including a wider variety of examples to strongly support your main points. Real-world examples can make your argument more convincing.

Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, supported by relevant details and examples. This will enhance the clarity of your argument.

Introduction

You have a clear thesis statement that sets the direction of the essay, which is excellent for guiding the reader.

Structure

Your introduction and conclusion are well-defined, framing your argument effectively.

Content

You've successfully identified and discussed both sides of the issue, contributing to a well-rounded argument.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Nowadays, people of all ages from certain parts of the world spend most time at home rather than going outdoors. Discuss the reasons, is this negative or positive development?

Many, small local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does thsi affect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Some people think that younger people are not suitable for important positions in government. Others think that it will be a good idea for younger people to take on these positions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some believe that nuclear weapons benefit the world at large. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, people are not living longer the ever before. some people say an aging population, create problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if he has more elderly people. To what extent to the advantages of having an Asian population outweigh the disadvantages.

Many people say that globalization and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effect on the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position. Write at least 250 words