Some people say that universities should only accept the young students with the highest marks. However, others think that universities should accept people of all ages that may not do well at school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
To start with, I believe that education is a crucial part of human beings, we have to
study
more and more every day to develop ourselves, to be better, and just to survive. However
, not everyone has an opportunity
to study
, because of their age
, school grades, etc. I truly believe that it is an unequal right, because people
deserve to be educated, and age
or past school life is not the reason not to give them pieces of knowledge.
Education is important for the reason of living, you can't
survive without working, but we get our job only after getting a degree. Not only do I think that people
get their jobs after university, but they are also
going to work after studying at some courses or lower educational institutions. Those institutions have a diploma for students
, but I think that working in a high-quality job, after a degree like this
is impossible. As a matter of fact, companies or corporations are asking about a high-quality diploma, so people
who didn't
attend university have no opportunity
to improve their selves, which supports the idea that people
of all age
groups should be allowed to study
to have a bright working career. In addition
to this
, not everyone had an opportunity
to study
when they were younger, so it's a good decision to fix this
problem.
I suppose that people
who are against fewer elderly people
studying got scared of the statistics of university or maybe, talking exactly about students
they are terrified that they will be replaced by those people
who have more experience in their lives and maybe smarter in some fields of studying. Personally, I think that students
shouldn't
be afraid of those people
, and they can help them so at the same time that people
will tell them about their life experiences and they would know something new equally. About
the statistics of universities, the heads of institutions can create a system of looking after older Change preposition
Regarding
students
by
younger ones, for Change preposition
with
this
work, they can have some points at subjects or other facilities, and for both age
groups, it will be satisfying and easy to study
.
To sum up
, everyone should study
and be satisfied by it as far as with their work after having a degree. Giving an opportunity
to study
to people
who didn't
have it before, is the best idea for increasing economics and improvement of working corporations.Submitted by wegeeetz on
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Coherence
Your essay presents a thoughtful discussion on the topic, however, clarity could be further improved by ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea with clear examples.
Structure
Remember to introduce your main argument or viewpoint in the introduction and restate it succinctly in the conclusion for a stronger, more rounded essay.
Examples
Including more specific examples to support your points will make your argument more persuasive and comprehensive.
Flow
Ensure a smooth and logical flow of ideas within and between paragraphs to enhance readability.
Task response
You effectively addressed both viewpoints, showing an understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Engagement
Your passionate belief in the importance of education comes through strongly, adding a personal touch to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.