Some people think that parents have an powerful influence in child's life, while the influence from outside the home plays a bigger part of child's development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, some individuals believe that
parents
affect a child’s life significantly, however
, society has a larger influence
on a child’s future. From my perspective, I believe that this
given argument is justified.
First of all, it is true that parents
are necessary in children
’s development. As an old saying goes: “Parents
are children
’s first teachers
in their life.” I believe that fathers’ and mothers’ behavior
absolutely affects youngsters. There is a report that said over 80% of Change the spelling
behaviour
children
who are under 4 years old would mimic their parents
’ actions, and, in addition
, when they grow up, their personalities will be similar to their parents
’.
However
, as far as I am concerned, society, such
as friends
, classmates, and teachers
, would have a greater influence
. Firstly
, most children
spend their time in school after the age of 6. Teachers
not only teach them knowledge but also
influence
their beliefs and values. For instance
, in many schools, if teachers
’ quality is not good enough and they always punish students harshly, it can negatively affect most of the children
’s lives. In addition
, classmates and friends
may also
impact children
strongly. Besides
teachers
and parents
, children
always stay with their friends
. Especially teenagers, some of whom do not want to spend time with their parents
, may spend most of their day hanging out with their friends
and doing things without parental guidance. For example
, a boy who always spends hours with his friends
, who often commit
crimes, Correct subject-verb agreement
commits
such
as theft, threats, or gambling, may lose his way in life. Therefore
, external factors and people may have a deep influence
on young people.
In conclusion, parents
, of course, have a strong effect on children
, while
I believe that society may have a stronger impact on their growth, as a result
of children
spending more time with friends
and teachers
while
they form their beliefs and values.Submitted by fiasngs on
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the topic and presents a clear position throughout. Continue to support your arguments with relevant examples and explanations to reinforce your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a logical structure in your essay by clearly separating your ideas into paragraphs, each devoted to a specific argument. Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas and paragraphs.
general
Consider varying your sentence structures and using synonyms to enhance language variety. This can make your essay even more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of language proficiency.
coherence cohesion
Excellent use of cohesive devices to connect ideas and paragraphs, making your essay easy to follow.
task achievement
Providing specific examples to support your arguments strengthens your essay and makes your standpoint convincing.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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