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some people think that children should be homeschooled when they are very young, while others think it is better for them to attend kinder garden. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #children #garden
Some people argue that parents should provide in-house teaching for their preschool
children
,
whereas
 others believe that they should send their offspring to
nursery
Correct article usage
a nursery
show examples
set up
Correct your spelling
set-up
show examples
. I strongly agree with the latter statement and I will provide enough examples to prove my opinion.
Firstly
, I firmly believe that kindergarten facilitates a formal curriculum for the kids and it enhances
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
learning in a systematic way.
For instance
, some educational institutions adopt a scientifically proven learning method like gaining knowledge through activities, poems, stories, and pictures.
This
 eventually makes the schooling environment more interactive and
children
 easily get familiar with the subject matter.
In addition
, the presence of peer groups inside the classroom emphasizes socialization and improves communication skills among
children
. To exemplify that, in similar age groups kids can engage in various play activities and through
this
, they can boost their physical and intellectual abilities.
On the other hand
, many people think that bonding time with parents becomes the most crucial part of offspring's early stage of development.
Therefore
, it would be unnecessary for toddlers to go to school as early as possible.
Moreover
, they argue that
Children
 should spend most of their time playing outside, which might be lacking if they attend kindergarten.
For example
, some Daycare centres
not
Change the verb form
do not
did not
show examples
 give adequate attention to kids which leads to some mis happenings like child abduction. Many parents worry that their sons or daughters do not have sufficient time to play and explore things. In conclusion,
although
 both views bring strong justifications, I would still argue that schools offer many things that could help
children
 in their development stage.
Submitted by dixonpeter24 on

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clarity
Expand your arguments with more detailed examples to enhance clarity.
sentence structure
Consider varying your sentence structures to add complexity and sophistication to your writing.
stance consistency
For higher scores, ensure a clear stance is maintained throughout the essay, with each paragraph contributing clearly to your overall argument.
introduction
You've done a good job introducing the topic and providing a clear thesis statement.
example use
Effective use of examples to support your points.
structure
Your essay has a coherent structure, making it easy to follow.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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