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Writing Samples /
Band 7

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

#countries #governments #technology #government #money
In the digital day of age, the investment of many governments is focused on new technology to resolve the public.
This
 author believes that
this
 is a waste way to use government
due to
 the fact that there are much safer solutions to handle the mob. It is important to realize that a lot of technology is being developed to disperse protestors with minimal harm.
This
 is because to the fact using pepper spray to put an end to rebels is still deemed harsh and may even result in blindness. Governments,
therefore
, are supporting scientists and engineers to find safer ways to put an end to campaigns. Using the United States as an example, they have developed an automated turret that can focus heat on a target for a brief period of time, causing discomfort without leaving permanent damage. The writer believes that funds intended for advanced weaponry could be used to satisfy public wants. The majority of protests, it goes without saying, are caused by the fact that many people feel certain things to be inadequate and the governors refuse to make any improvements.
Therefore
, it is the responsibility of leaders to provide funding for initiatives that raise urban infrastructure and inhabitants' quality of life.
As a result
, the authorities won’t have to use force and there will be fewer complaints from private citizens In conclusion, governments around the world are spending their money on technology to create non-lethal weapons that can be used against the general public.
This
 author believes that money like that should be spent to improve people’s quality of life in the interim

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structure
Focus on clearly outlining your main points and arguments within the introduction to guide readers through your essay.
coherence
To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph has a single main idea that is clearly stated and supported with examples or explanations.
cohesion
For better cohesion, use linking words and phrases to show the relationship between paragraphs and within paragraphs.
response coverage
Enhance your task achievement by fully addressing both parts of the question, providing balanced arguments and examples for each.
example relevance
Make sure your examples are directly relevant and clearly support your argument. Consider using real-world situations or data.
engagement
Your essay engages with the topic and provides a clear opinion, which is good for task response.
conclusion
Your conclusion summarizes the essay's main points and reiterates your viewpoint effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital transformation
  • service delivery
  • transparency
  • accountability
  • tech-savvy
  • contemporary lifestyle
  • public satisfaction
  • data management
  • smart city technologies
  • predictive policing
  • data privacy
  • digital divide
  • inclusivity
  • governance
  • infrastructure
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