In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or mall to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, people tend to
do
Correct your spelling
go
show examples
shopping in the huge
mall
rather than in local shops. It sparked a lot of debate since small shops
affected
Add a missing verb
are affected
show examples
by
this
phenomenon as they can be
stop
Wrong verb form
stopped
show examples
operating their businesses.
This
essay will mention both
of
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apply
show examples
pros and cons,
subsequently
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subsequently,
show examples
I will prove that
this
issue is a negative
development
.
To begin
with, a convincing argument can be made that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shopping
centers
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centres
show examples
can make some
humans
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human's
humans'
show examples
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
easier.
For example
, they can
fulfill
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fulfil
show examples
their different needs just in one place
while
they can compare one brand to another by price, quality, or other values.
In other words
, they receive lucrative deals by shopping in the gigantic
market
through time and money saving.
That is
the reason citizens like to buy there.
On the other hand
, not every seller can follow the
development
pace of
these large
Change the determiner
this large mall
these large malls
show examples
mall
. In fact, they sometimes can not compete and end up being unemployed.
For instance
, Tanah Abang
Market
is closed nowadays since there is a
mall
, called Sencity
Mall
that is
built right after Tanah Abang
Market
.
This
phenomenon
create
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creates
show examples
some loss for the individuals who work in Tanah Abang
Market
.
Furthermore
, it
also
increases
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the economy
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economy
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economic
show examples
gap between the large business owner and the small business owner. In essence, it is a
development
that brings adverse impacts socially.
To sum up
,
this
development
create
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creates
show examples
some impacts.
Although
we realize the advantages of large shopping
centers
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centres
show examples
for particular people, it does not erase the drawbacks that make more
society
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of society
show examples
suffer.
Submitted by Qia on

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introduction
Ensure a clear and well-structured introduction that directly addresses the question. Consider stating your opinion or stance clearly from the beginning.
coherence
Improve paragraph structure by using a variety of linking words effectively to enhance the flow between ideas.
examples
Support your main points with more specific examples or evidence. This will help strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
accuracy
Be cautious with spelling, grammar, and punctuation to ensure clarity and professionalism in your writing.
balance
When discussing both views or multiple aspects of an issue, devote equal attention and detail to each to provide a balanced analysis.
balanced view
You have addressed both positive and negative aspects of the development, which shows a consideration of multiple perspectives.
conclusion
Your essay concludes with a clear summarization of your viewpoint, which is good practice.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic downturn
  • local artisans
  • monopolization
  • cultural homogenization
  • sustainability
  • carbon footprint
  • e-commerce
  • proximity shopping
  • urban sprawl
  • retail ecosystem
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