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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Topic: The graph bellow gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Topic: The graph bellow gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
#topic #bellow #information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions
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The given graph illustrates some data about the proportion of how many of people living in cities in 4 Asian countries from 1970 to 2020, and it predicts the total population of them for 2030 and 2040.
Overall
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, the line graph
including
Replace the word
includes
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Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia with an upward trend during the period.
The
Correct article usage
A
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 noticeable change occurs in
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 of Malaysia from 30% to 83% in 1970 and 2040 respectively.
Likewise
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, the percentage of Indonesia experiences the same pattern from 12% in 1970 to 62% in 2024.
According to
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 the line graph, the trend of Thailand’s population increased
19
Change preposition
from 19
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% in the first year to 30% in 1990, and
then
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 approximately remained flat till 2020.
In addition
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; it goes up to 45% in the
last
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 year.
Moreover
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, the Philippines’ line began from 30
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 and
then
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leveled
Change the spelling
levelled
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 off in 1980, and it had
growth
Add an article
a growth
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 spurt in 1990 and reached
to
Change preposition
apply
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50
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 in 2000.
Additionally
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, it decreased to 40% in 2010 and again increased until 2024.
Submitted by abhari1997 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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