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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In some developing countries, it is difficult to get good teachers to work in rural areas which can have a negative impact on the education of children in those rural communities. Why do you think good teachers do not want to work in rural areas in developing countries? What could be done to solve this problem?

In many developing nations, the scarcity of proficient
educators
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 in rural
areas
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 poses a severe problem to the educational advancement of children in these communities.
This
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 essay will explore the reasons behind the reluctance of good
teachers
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 to work in rural settings and propose viable solutions to address
this
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 pressing issue. One significant reason why competent
educators
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 are hesitant to work in rural
areas
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 of developing countries is the lack of essential amenities and infrastructure. Remote regions often suffer from inadequate living conditions, limited access to healthcare, insufficient educational resources, and minimal career advancement prospects for
teachers
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.
For instance
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, the absence of proper housing facilities or access to quality healthcare services in rural
areas
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 can dissuade
educators
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 from relocating, fearing compromised living standards for themselves and their families. To alleviate the dearth of good
teachers
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 in rural settings, several pragmatic solutions can be implemented.
Firstly
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, governments should offer incentives and benefits tailored to attract
educators
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 to rural postings.
This
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 might include providing improved housing facilities, access to healthcare, financial incentives, or career advancement opportunities.
For instance
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, offering subsidized housing or additional allowances to
teachers
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 who commit to rural service for a stipulated period could incentivize them to consider these
areas
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.
Secondly
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, investing in the development of rural infrastructure and educational facilities is crucial. Equipping rural schools with adequate resources, modern technology, and training programmes for
teachers
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 can create a conducive environment that fosters their commitment to teaching in these regions.
For instance
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, establishing mentorship programmes or professional development initiatives tailored to rural
educators
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' needs can enhance their teaching abilities and job satisfaction. In conclusion, the dearth of proficient
teachers
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 in rural
areas
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 of developing countries stems from various challenges.
However
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, offering tailored incentives to
educators
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 and improving rural infrastructure and educational resources can serve as potent solutions to attract and retain competent
teachers
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 in these underserved regions, thereby enriching the educational experience of children in rural communities.

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples to better illustrate your points and enhance the persuasive element of your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next, perhaps by using more linking phrases that connect ideas across paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure with an effective introduction and conclusion, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.
task achievement
You effectively identify key issues and propose feasible solutions, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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