Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Many individuals believe that with the purpose of avoiding disease and illness, the government should concentrate on alleviating residential housing

problems

Use synonyms

and

pollution

Use synonyms

. The writer advocates

this

Linking Words

statement as its positive consequences. Speaking of environmental

pollution

Use synonyms

this

Linking Words

leads to global warming which

also

Linking Words

causes some infectious diseases. What the author means is that when the temperature is rising and

then

Linking Words

the ice caps will melt rapidly and the sea levels are

also

Linking Words

going up. These changes can cause the

releasing

Replace the word

release

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of bacteria being captured in frozen ice and flooding or even worse

that is

Linking Words

the increase of occurring natural disasters.

As a consequence

Linking Words

, there will be more severe diseases and higher death rates.

Hence

Linking Words

, the authorities should pay attention and efforts to tackle

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

environmental

pollution

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. Moving on to housing

problems

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, it should be acknowledged that the residents who live in high-standard housing estates tend to have longer

lifespan

Fix the agreement mistake

lifespans

show examples

than those living in the lower ones. A house is where people stay for a long period of time so it affects directly their physical and mental health,

instead

Linking Words

of spending money on other

problems

Use synonyms

, creating a housing estate can reduce the tendency to be ill.

In other words

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will reduce the noise in the living environment and there will be no traffic and exchanging activities so it

also

Linking Words

helps eliminate the noise causing irritation.

This

Linking Words

enhances the living standard and the residential health.

To conclude

Linking Words

, it is vital for the government to make a fortune and effort to reduce housing

problems

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and environmental

pollution

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in order to prevent illness and disease.

Mon Apr 22 2024

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Language/Sentence Structure

Ensure a varied and complex sentence structure to improve readability and demonstrate advanced language skills.

Argument/Example Diversity

Develop arguments with more diverse examples and evidence to strengthen your reasoning and provide a comprehensive viewpoint.

Coherence/Linking Words

To further increase coherence, consider employing a wider range of linking words and phrases, ensuring smooth transitions between ideas.

Task Achievement

The essay clearly identifies and supports the statement that government focus on environmental pollution and housing can prevent illness and disease, which showcases strong task achievement.

Coherence/Cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are well-developed, effectively framing the essay's argument, which contributes to a higher score in task coherence.

Argument Strength

You've successfully incorporated relevant examples to support your points about the impact of pollution and housing on health, enhancing your argument's credibility.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Environmental pollution
Public health
Respiratory diseases
Cardiovascular conditions
Infectious diseases
Mental health problems
Government intervention
Industrial emissions
Clean energy sources
Public housing policies
Safe and affordable housing
Environmental hazards
Green public spaces
Community well-being
Physical inactivity

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Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

In some countries, more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this question?

In the past, people stored knowledge in the book. Nowadays, people store knowledge on the internet. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Young people’s ideas and attitudes are different from those of their parents and grandparents. What are the differences? What problems may be caused?