The costs of international travel are decreasing and tourism is growing. Do you believe that the advantages of increasing tourism outweigh its disadvantages?

The expenses required for international travel are declining, which has caused the
tourism
industry
to improve, and I believe that
this
growth can bring some advantageous points. On the one hand, there a numerous individuals who claim that travelling to other cities, other countries, and even other continents has been more convenient
due to
the tremendous number of available facilities encompassing easier transport and access to the internet to have a more comfortable communication.
Therefore
,
people
tend to explore numerous areas all over the world, which can cause the destination country to have a more powerful
tourism
industry
. The more a country attracts
tourists
, the more it has job opportunities, money flow, improved life conditions, and
overall
welfare.
For example
, Singapore has been attracting a remarkable number of travellers from all over the world using advertisements, making the visa approval process easier, and constructing modern and convenient accommodations.
However
, the other group of
people
declare that with travelling, which has become more comfortable, and the development of social media, absorbing more
tourists
is disadvantageous for some countries
due to
the fact that visitors are able to damage the virginity of nature in some areas. Many unique regions in the world have remained unknown until recently, and with the development of the
tourism
industry
, they have witnessed the entrance of a substantial number of
people
, which brought them inevitable drawbacks.
For instance
, there are some scenic islands in the southern part of Iran that have unique soil, strange species of fish, and virgin beaches that have been threatened with disappearance
due to
the uncountable income of
tourists
. In conclusion, considering the pros and cons of enhancing the
tourism
industry
,
although
some
people
believe that
tourists
can put society in danger, I affirm that
tourism
is a precious
industry
which can play a positive role in boosting a society's condition both financially and socially.
Submitted by mojgan.sobhani on

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Content Development
Ensure a balanced discussion by thoroughly exploring both advantages and disadvantages with equal depth.
Language Use
Consider including a wider range of sentence structures to enhance the complexity and flow of your arguments.
Supporting Examples
Incorporate more specific examples to substantiate your points, especially when discussing the impact of tourism on society and the environment.
Task Response
You've effectively addressed the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of the increase in tourism due to lower travel costs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay demonstrates good logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs that focus on distinct points, and a cohesive conclusion.
Use of Examples
The real-world example of Singapore and the islands in southern Iran effectively illustrate your points and provide a concrete basis for your arguments.

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