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Band 6.5

Lack of fresh water is becoming a global issue of increasing importance. what problems does this shortage case? what measures could be taken to overcome these problems?

#lack #water #importance #shortage #case #measures
In modern society, the problem of shortage of aqua pure is becoming more significant and the importance of
this
 is increasing. The main cause of pure
water
 lack is the pollution of resources which
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 consumes for household purposes, and the best solution for
this
 complication is to help the community understand the significance of
water
 by providing video clips about
this
 catastrophe. The major reason for
this
 future global concern is contamination of
water
 supplies
such
 as lakes, seas,oceans and rivers. Individuals by throwing their garbage like bottles, cans , plastic bags and cigarette tubs, are clogging the ocean which leads to the pollution of
water
.
Due to
this
, a good amount of chemicals are damaging the planet's resources,like a cigar which contains cocaine which is harmful to a person's health.
For example
,
according to
 the
last
 survey 65 per cent of the river in Almaty called Malaya Almatinka is full of a carton which was thrown by locals. Of course,
due to
this
 society is suffering from a deficiency of fresh
water
 supply. To tackle
this
 issue people should convey information about
this
 obstacle, by posting videos or posts adding photos of that mess on platforms
such
 as Instagram, Tik-tok and YouTube where a lot of people spend their time, they can see that if they do not pollute the
water
 resources, there will not be lack of fresh
water
.
For instance
, research carried out that nowadays 95% of the crowd around the world are informed about crucial catastrophes by social media. In conclusion, impurity is a major problem that can result in
shortage
Add an article
a shortage
show examples
 of pure
water
,
nevertheless
 , it can be addressed by informing the public about
this
 global issue.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Introduction clarity
Make sure your introduction clearly outlines the scope of the problem and the focus of your essay. Introduce both the problems and the solutions you will discuss.
Paragraph structure
When presenting causes and effects, structure your paragraphs so each problem is clearly linked to its corresponding solution, maintaining a clear and direct relationship throughout.
Linking words
Use a range of linking words and phrases to ensure a seamless flow between ideas, and check for repetitive structures that could be varied for better cohesion.
Conclusion strength
In your conclusion, sum up the problems and solutions discussed thoroughly to ensure a strong finish. Restate your main points succinctly to reinforce the essay's message.
Use of examples
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the issue with relevant examples, enhancing the clarity of your arguments.
Solution insight
You've aptly identified a key cause of water scarcity and proposed a contemporary and viable solution, showing insightful thinking.
Logical structure
The structure of your essay overall shows logical progression from problem introduction to solution, making your argument convincing and easy to follow.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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