Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent to do you agree?

#people #sites #facebook #impact #individuals #society

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It is considered by some individuals that, social networking

sites

for example

Facebook

have had a detrimental

effect

on individual

people

and local communities.

However

, I believe it has a beneficial

effect

on a person but has several drawbacks for societies and local

people

To begin

with, many social networking

sites

for instance

Facebook

, are considered positive in many ways for individuals. Those living in different countries are far away from their families, so it is a good platform to unite them with just one click and reduce the long-distance short. The feeling of homesickness is reduced by

this

modern technology before

this

invention, it was hard to ask their loved ones how life going. It took ages to get a letter and they reply those letters after months. But these days it normalizes life, so networking

sites

Facebook

and many other platforms like Instagram, WhatsApp, and Snapchat are the fast-connecting networks in today's world that join

people

from different parts of the world just in seconds.

In addition

, the

effect

this

opposite

Correct article usage

the opposite

show examples

for society and local communities because

people

are more focused

to make

Change preposition

on making

show examples

friends from around the world. They are more curious to adapt

their

Change preposition

to their

show examples

cultures by direct connection with the

people

living

their

Replace the word

there

show examples

. They are forgetting their own culture and languages and trying to copy them.

This

happens because of the involvement of these social websites everyone has access to their news because of social media. The communities are breaking into fragments as they try to talk to one who is not close to them and one who is sitting beside them they are neglecting them.

Hence

the rate of depression, and loneliness is increasing day by day and families are distanced as well.

Therefore

, it has a harmful

effect

on society. In conclusion, social media like

Facebook

has a positive

effect

on the person individually but for society, it is alarming because many stress-related factors are originating just because of

this

. In my opinion ,

Change the capitalization

show examples

can not deny the positive side of these

sites

but it has some drawbacks as well.

Submitted by aimenmalik2021 on Sat Apr 27 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure consistency in your views throughout the essay to effectively communicate your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use a wider range of cohesive devices and paragraphing effectively to structure your essay more clearly.

Task Achievement

Focus on expanding your ideas with more depth and detail, particularly in supporting your arguments with specific examples.

Language

Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and strive for accuracy in your language use.

Content

Your essay effectively discusses both sides of the argument, showing a balanced view.

Structure

You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

349 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

erosion
face-to-face
interactions
privacy concerns
data breaches
misinformation
polarize
cyberbullying
online harassment
procrastination
productivity
social isolation
dissemination
breeding ground
vast amounts
personal information
mental health

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Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent to do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Life in many cities around the world is becoming so expensive that one day only rich people will be able to live there. What are the causes of this situation? What measures could be taken to solve the problem?

Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters. Do you agree or disagree?

Schools have the social responsibility to discourage children from eating junk food. Others think it is the parent's responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

With the development of social media, more and more youngsters are being allowed unsupervised access to the Internet. What potential problems may this trend lead to? What solutions can you suggest to deal with it?