Today, some young people say that their mobile phones are the most important thing they own. Do you think that the popularity of mobile phones is a good or bad thing?
Presently, technology advances way quicker than a majority of humanity can keep up with ,
thus
, significantly increasing the technological incorporation between humans and their cell phones
. In the contemporary world, it is important to acknowledge that mobile phones
have become an indispensable part of our daily lives, especially for the younger generation. It is my contention that this
trend is a multifaceted phenomenon encompassing both positive and negative implications for juveniles.
First and foremost, after the invention of mobile phones
, the market demand has constantly been increasing, attributable to the multitudinous benefits that they provide. In today's world, mobile phones
have become an integral part of younger individuals, offering them full flexibility and overarching control over their daily routines. To cite an example, now with a click of a screen, children can easily handle their basic needs without even spending a considerable amount of time
. Consequently
, the ease of access and effectiveness of services will make life easier for juveniles so that they can devote more time
towards their educational improvement.
On the other hand
, unfortunately, people who have higher screen time
are likely to develop a cell phone addiction which perpetually captivates users' attention. Furthermore
, now that youngsters are rigorously exposed to social media through their phones
, they fall victim to global trends on platforms such
as Tik-Tok, Instagram and Facebook. For example
, spending too much time
scrolling through internet materials can undermine eyesight to a greater extent. Moreover
, another demerit of using smartphones relates to turning adolescents into introverts since they will likely isolate themselves from their counterparts.
In conclusion, while
mobile phones
play a crucial role in ensuring uninterrupted communication as well as
facilitating the daily lives of youngsters, the ramifications of telephone overuse trigger adverse effects on their physical and social well-being.Submitted by orkhanshamil on
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task achievement
Expand on your examples by providing more detailed scenarios or statistics to further illustrate your points, which could strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Try to engage with the prompt more critically by reflecting on the broader implications or possible futures based on current trends.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure a balance between your paragraphs in terms of length and depth of analysis to maintain a smooth flow of ideas.
task achievement
Your essay effectively covers both sides of the issue, providing a balanced viewpoint.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear, effectively framing your essay's argument.
coherence and cohesion
You have structured your essay logically, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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