"prevention is better than cure". Research and treating is too costly. so it would be better to invest in preventive measure. To what extend do you agree.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
modern world, people tend to give more focus to their health. In fact, after the pandemic, research shows that people eating healthy foods and taking preventive immunizations have significantly increased in the
last
Linking Words
decade.
This
Linking Words
positive trend indicates that
prevention
Use synonyms
is better than
cure
Use synonyms
.
Conversely
Linking Words
, if individuals neglect their preventive measures, after the onset of the disease, they may face expensive medical treatments for
cure
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, to be on the safer side,
prevention
Use synonyms
is better than
cure
Use synonyms
and I have the following reasons to support my stance.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in the world we
livein
Correct your spelling
live in
, chronic diseases like diabetes and cardiovascular disorders are on the rise. These
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
show examples
can be easily averted by having an active lifestyle by following regular exercises, frequent health checkups and reducing fast food intake.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, if an individual couldn't spend 60 minutes a day to take care of their body, they would need to spend a significant chunk of their salary on expensive medications later.
Secondly
Linking Words
, as we learnt from the recent pandemic, vaccination is the best way to prevent outbreaks in society. In human history, vaccines played a key role in preventing outbreaks like Malaria, Influenza & Measles in the past. In fact, taking a vaccine is very cost-effective compared to the medical expenses after the onset of the disease.
Additionally
Linking Words
, when the community is healthy, people will be less absent
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
their work, which in turn contributes positively to the productivity of the economy.
Conversely
Linking Words
, productivity takes a nose dive when the population is ill.
This
Linking Words
outlines the significance of
prevention
Use synonyms
than
Rephrase
rather than
show examples
cure
Use synonyms
. So
to conclude
Linking Words
, I support the stance that
prevention
Use synonyms
is better than
cure
Use synonyms
, as it is both the economical and
also
Linking Words
the best option for us.
However
Linking Words
, not all the diseases can be prevented. There are certain
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
show examples
like Type-1 Diabetes, Cancer etc, which are still an enigma to the doctors. Till now, we don't have any conclusive reasons, why these diseases occur in the first place and expensive treatments are the only solution at the moment.
Hence
Linking Words
, disease
prevention
Use synonyms
is good, but
in addition
Linking Words
to that, we should
also
Linking Words
have a balanced approach to healthcare moving forward.
Submitted by nusramkumar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure
Ensure each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that signals the content to follow. This enhances readability and focus.
Cohesion
Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices and transitional phrases to link ideas more smoothly.
Supporting Evidence
Include more detailed examples and evidence to support your arguments. While the provided examples are relevant, further specificity could enhance the persuasiveness of your essay.
Language
Occasionally, review the grammatical structures and vocabulary used to express your ideas. Exploring more complex and varied sentence structures can improve the sophistication of your writing.
Introduction/Conclusion
You effectively introduced and concluded your essay, neatly bookending your arguments.
Position
You maintained a clear stance throughout the essay, effectively arguing that prevention is better than cure.
Structure
Your essay was well-structured, with each paragraph dedicated to a specific point in support of your thesis. This logical structure aids in the coherence of your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • chronic diseases
  • cardiovascular
  • preventive measures
  • regular exercise
  • healthy diet
  • mental health check-ups
  • stress management
  • community support
  • vaccines
  • public health campaigns
  • outbreaks
  • influenza
  • measles
  • COVID-19
  • economic benefits
  • absenteeism
  • productivity
  • healthcare systems
  • balanced approach
What to do next:
Look at other essays: