Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some collegians suggest that they should learn more from others
instead
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of their main
subjects
Use synonyms
. Others suppose that investing their time and effort in studying for a degree is more vital.
This
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essay will present two ideas and some reasons why I am convinced by the second opinion. On the one hand, Exposure to multiple majors can help learners gain
overall
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development and social skills.
Besides
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, studies can
also
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form various ways of thinking and problem-solving, and it is
also
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a good chance to have a broader knowledge.
For example
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, scholars who learning many
subjects
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can approach problems with many different visions and angles.
Therefore
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, they are easy to solve issues and adapt to various careers and situations.
Moreover
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, topics like History enhance curiosity and get deep insight into cultures, societies, and historical contexts.
Therefore
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it promotes empathy and global awareness.
On the other hand
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, some benefits of studying main
subjects
Use synonyms
need to be paid attention. First of all, it helps students gain a deeper understanding and expertise in their major. From that, they can have advanced research and professional success.
Furthermore
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, having specific knowledge of specializations brings opportunities to have high-paying and quality jobs.
In addition
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, if just studying some right topics, collegians will experience less pressure and their studies more efficiently.
For instance
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, they can perform better academically and maintain a healthier balance between their studies and personal life. In conclusion, depending on whether each one will be interested in learning more majors or not. But in my view, I suppose that learners should pay more attention to the main
subjects
Use synonyms
to serve their aim of getting qualifications.
Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on

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coherence cohesion
Try to work on the overall organization of your essay. Although each paragraph presents ideas clearly, the transitions between paragraphs can be smoother.
task achievement
Ensure that your main points are well-supported with relevant examples. For instance, your point about History promoting empathy could be expanded with a specific example or case study.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing your arguments well.
task achievement
Your essay covers both viewpoints effectively, showing a balanced understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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