TSome people believe that one of the best ways to solve environmental problem is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is a divisive opinion in society, where some folks believe that the best way to curb environmental problems is to hike
fuel
prices
for vehicles
. Though hiking prices
might reduce the usage of cars, which in turn reduces harmful exhaust from the vehicles
, I personally believe it would be quite an unpopular decision. Hence
, I completely disagree with this
myopic view and I have the following reasons to support my stance.
Foremost, a hike in fuel
prices
will have a direct impact on the vehicle manufacturing sector. This
is because, demand for vehicles
would plummet when the petrol cost spikes, causing the reduction in the 4 wheelers manufacturing. Since, the manufacturing sector employs a good chunk of the population, many employees would lose jobs as a result
. This
would lead to an economic depression in the country and create a cascading effect, where other transport-dependent sectors like Tourism might potentially suffer as well.
Secondly
, with the reduction in car usage, there might be a scenario where people tend to prefer public transport as an alternative. However
, a huge rush would be created as an outcome of the increased demand for these vehicles
during office hours. For instance
, in Mumbai, most people prefer public transport during peak hours and in those times, public transports including trains are heavily packed, which is almost impossible for students or office goers to travel.
So to summarize, there are many ways like planting trees, usage of renewable energy etc to solve environmental problems, but raising fuel
costs is not the right one. If fuel
prices
get hiked, for the short term it can provide benefits, but in the long run
it will create undesirable effects for the country.Add a comma
run,
Submitted by nusramkumar on
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Task Achievement
Make sure to introduce both sides of the argument briefly, even if you're going to focus on one side for a more balanced introduction.
Task Achievement
Increase the clarity of your stance throughout the essay to avoid any ambiguity regarding your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance flow and coherence.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize paragraphs clearly with one main idea per paragraph and use topic sentences to introduce each paragraph's main idea.
Task Achievement
You provided relevant examples to support your points, helping to create a persuasive argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay was well-structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which made it easy to follow.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite