Some people believe that the main benefit of international cooperation is in the environment, others maintain that the major profit is the development of world business. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #benefit #cooperation #environment #profit #development #world #business

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Recently,

countries

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all over the

world

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have made international

cooperation

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not only to help each other but

also

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to improve our lives. I understand that

cooperation

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is beneficial for protecting the

environment

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, but at the same time, I think

this

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also

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profitable to

world

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finances with many lucrative contracts.

Firstly

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, protecting the

environment

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by international contracts is important because people cannot live without natural resources and it provides essential things to us. By having international

cooperation

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, many

countries

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will make eco-friendly contracts that seem effective at reducing pollution or keeping it clean.

For instance

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, a decade ago, there was an oil spill incident, which had a huge detrimental effect on the ocean

environment

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Hence

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, to solve

this

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problem, a lot of organisations and

countries

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worked together to recover the ocean

environment

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, so they could have been able to clean it up quicker than we thought. I was amazed by how international

cooperation

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is important to managing

world

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problems, and I

also

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have realised since that situation that protecting the

environment

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is important.

On the other hand

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, some may have claimed that developing

world

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businesses

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

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more important. I understand

this

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suggestion because

world

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economies affect individual's lives. What

this

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explains is that just imagine the US economy these days,

for instance

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, as their finances went worse, other

countries

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, including South Korea, are struggling with hard financial times.

In addition

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, if we use international

cooperation

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to develop

world

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businesses, more investment and trade will arise which will improve not only

countries

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' profits but

also

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individuals' jobs or other chances.

Thus

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, I believe improving

world

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business seems beneficial for both individuals and corporations.

To sum up

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, as compared above, international

cooperation

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seems to have merits from both

environment

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and

world

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business.

However

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, as a person who puts more value on environmental problems, I believe we should suggest more

cooperation

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around the

world

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to protect our

environment

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and our lives.

Submitted by kchengii on Tue May 14 2024

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task response

Your response is strong overall, but be sure to highlight both views more explicitly and balance them equally before stating your own opinion. Make sure that each standpoint is developed to a similar extent.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph logically follows from the one before by using more devices such as transitional phrases. This will make the essay flow better and increase readability.

coherence and cohesion

Try to add a bit more depth when discussing the points, perhaps by elaborating on how international cooperation benefits both environment and business, and including more specific examples for each.

coherence and cohesion

You’ve provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which neatly frame your discussion and opinion.

coherence and cohesion

The essay uses a logical structure, transitioning from discussing environmental benefits to business benefits, and then delivering your viewpoint. This gives your essay a clear and effective organization.

task response

You have managed to incorporate relevant specific examples to support your main points, making the discussion more concrete and compelling.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

318 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

international cooperation
environmental policies
green technologies
combating climate change
global trade
foreign investments
international standards
regulations
global sustainability
mutually beneficial
long term well-being
complexity
balanced approach

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Some people believe that the main benefit of international cooperation is in the environment, others maintain that the major profit is the development of world business. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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some think that young people should be free to choose any career they like, while other say that they should think more realistically about their future. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries should not employ skilled labour from poor countries, as poor countries need the worker more. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Many people believe that education and high qualification will bring success. Others think that it is not required to achieve success in life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.