It is better for students to live away from home while studying at univeristy than to live with parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Nowaday's
Change noun form
Nowadays
show examples
students
are opting to stay away from home
while
studying at
college
rather than staying with their
parents
.
However
,
this
trend can cause serious issues
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
children, I will discuss both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
show examples
in
this
essay.
To begin
with, it has become a major trend for
college
-going
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
to move away from home
while
studying at
university
. One of the major
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
is that the
students
get
sense
Add an article
a sense
show examples
of
responsiblity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
, they learn
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how to manage their expenses and take care of daily chores, Apart from all these, they
also
get freedom, which they have been craving for
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
long
time
.
Students
can independently
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
their own
decision
Fix the agreement mistake
decisions
show examples
, without any interference from their
parents
. Most of the
students
enjoy
college
time
and would like to cherish
college
memories forever.
On the other hand
,
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
staying away from family during
university
find it difficult to manage after
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
period of
time
, it becomes really
time consuming
Add a hyphen
time-consuming
show examples
for them to complete all the activities of managing home and
college
simultaneously.
According to
one study,
university
students
staying alone are more prone to depression than
students
staying with
parents
. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
conclusion, I would like to say that
university
students
staying away from family and studying can make them responsible and independent, but it is important for them to share their feelings with
parents
on
regular
Add an article
a regular
show examples
basis so that they don't feel alone. One should make the decision to stay away from the family after considering all the factors and what suits them perfectly.
Submitted by neelima.sharma60 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

content
Include more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your essay and make it more convincing.
content
Ensure a better balance between opposing viewpoints. While you discussed both perspectives, elaborating equally on the cons will make your essay more balanced.
grammar
Work on grammar and sentence structure to avoid minor errors and improve readability.
structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which enhances readability and provides a good structure.
content
You addressed both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • life skills
  • manage finances
  • distractions
  • quiet study environment
  • social skills
  • sense of community
  • diverse backgrounds
  • time management
  • balance academic responsibilities
  • household chores
  • social activities
  • mature
  • sense of responsibility
  • financial burdens
  • utilities
  • affordable
  • emotional support
  • comfort
  • homesickness
  • stress
  • personal growth
  • handle challenges independently
What to do next:
Look at other essays: