Some people say that punishment is the best way to teach children to behave well, while others disagree and point out that rewarding and praising them is better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Teaching good behaviour should begin in childhood. There are many ways to teach.
While
punishing children
could lead to trauma, teaching them what is good or bad would lead to better outcomes.
On the one hand,punishments are one of the worst ways to teach children
how to behave well. This
could lead to numerous childhood traumas. If this
method is used, children
will not do the wrong things, not because they know this
is bad but because of fear that they will be punished again. Hence
, in the future, they could become isolated and afraid of making mistakes. For instance
, many adults who are perfectionists were punished in their childhood and, as a result
, became afraid of making mistakes. Therefore
, many physiologists do not recommend using this
method while
raising a child.
On the other hand
, rewarding and complimenting children
could lead to a better understanding of the difference between good and bad. Explain to them how to behave well and what manners to have well-behaved people, as children
are immature and do not have enough imagination about this
world. Consequently
, this
approach could result in better results. For example
, research conducted by Stanford University shows that, when children
are encouraged and given lots of affection, they are mostly well-mannered.
In conclusion, instead
of punishing and arguing with children
about their behaviour, which can lead to the worst consequences, parents could encourage and reward them by showing a lot of love. As a result
, many children
will behave themselves in a good manner.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task, discussing both views on the topic. However, enhancing the complexity and depth of your arguments could further strengthen your task response. Try to incorporate more specific examples and further elaborate on the reasons behind both perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is logically structured with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. To improve coherence and cohesion, consider using a few more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your arguments. This will make the essay flow even more smoothly.
task achievement
Your essay has a well-balanced structure, addressing both views and providing a personal opinion clearly in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, which is well-explained and supported by relevant examples, such as the Stanford University study.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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