IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The media should include more stories which report good news. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#media #stories #report #news
There are some ideas that good
news
 is under-reported, and the media should provide more to the public. I do not think
this
 is a good suggestion and give three main reasons why I totally disagree with it.
Firstly
, because of the limitation of the number of records on each media every day and the importance of bad
news
therefore
 journalists should not increase more good stories. Sad information from other countries helps
people
 not only know exactly what is happening in the world but
also
 provides enough time to find solutions to deal with it if necessary.
For example
, the governments have some specific policies to check carefully or isolate
people
 who come from other countries where serious infectious diseases exist.
Secondly
, publishing more desirable
news
 will make
subjective
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people
 surely think that there is no adverse side leading to some unexpected harmful situations.
Consequently
, they do not have any preparations in terms of damaged cases.
For instance
, citizens do not know there are some
society
Replace the word
societal
show examples
 vices in their living places because of a lack of information in
media
Correct article usage
the media
show examples
 leading to some serious results.
Finally
, it is extremely hard for censors to distinguish the difference between good and bad
news
 because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
goodness or badness is a relative concept based on each individual's experiences and specific situations. Some
people
,
for example
, think the information about the downward trend of the stock is unacceptable
while
 others suppose
that is
 a perfect chance to buy more. In conclusion, the number of good and bad
news
 is enough,
thus
 it is not essential to adjust.
Community
Add an article
The community
A community
show examples
 should focus on how accurate journalists supply to readers and viewers.
Submitted by luutrongto on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider refining the introduction to more precisely state your position and give a clear outline of the three main reasons you will discuss. This can make the essay structure clearer to the reader.
coherence cohesion
Work on providing clearer transitions between ideas in your paragraphs to improve the overall flow and coherence of your argument.
task achievement
Ensure that all your points directly relate to the task prompt about good news stories in the media. Some examples, although relevant, may benefit from more direct alignment with the main question.
coherence cohesion
Be cautious of awkward phrasing and complex sentence structures that could hinder the clarity of your points. Simpler and more direct language can sometimes improve understanding.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized and contains a clear introduction and conclusion that encapsulate the main ideas.
task achievement
Your arguments are generally relevant and you provide some good, specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
The essay maintains a clear and consistent stance throughout, supporting your main idea effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: