IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #internet #newspapers
It is believed that
due to
 the advent of the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
, newspapers seem to
lose
Wrong verb form
have lost
show examples
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 popularity among people . The writer of
this
 essay totally agrees with that notion
as a result
 of the convenience of e-papers alongside
cost-effeciency
Correct your spelling
cost-efficiency
. When it comes to digital newspapers ,
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 usefulness
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
should be taken into account
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
 in the recently busy society . To explain
further
 , people in the contemporary era tend to become much busier with their daily workloads which means if they spend
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 watching traditional papers ,
this
 will result in
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
insufficent
Correct your spelling
insufficient
 period to completely meet their deadlines every day .
However
 , the autonomous new articles updates on the
internet
 can effectively address
this
difficulity
Correct your spelling
difficulty
 since they ensure that
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 not only become able to catch up with
news
Correct article usage
the news
show examples
surround
Change the form of the verb
surrounding
show examples
 them but
also
 make sure that they still have
adequat
Correct your spelling
adequate
 time to solve their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
. Taking VNexpress as a primary example , recent
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 shown that employees who live in
hustle
Correct article usage
a hustle
show examples
 and bustle pace are prone to use
this
 website
due to
 its convenience . Another compelling reason that can be mentioned is that the
internet
-based
newpapers
Correct your spelling
newspapers
 cost people nothing .
That is
 to say , it is free for human to click and follow the news on
this
 website so that they can save their funds in order to pay
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
for other aspects of their life .
That is
not to mention
 , the variety of news on
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 can be caught without buying different conventional newspapers which
undoutedly
Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
benefits
Correct subject-verb agreement
benefit
show examples
 one's wallet .
Therefore
 , it is
understanable
Correct your spelling
understandable
 that the popularity of the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 newspaper will bring positive value .
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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coherence/cohesion
Ensure that sentences are grammatically correct and free of run-on sentences or fragments. For example, "That is to say, it is free for human to click and follow the news on this website..." could be more clearly phrased.
task achievement
Make sure to provide a balanced view by considering counterarguments. This could enhance the depth of your response not only by supporting the argument but offering an objective perspective.
coherence/cohesion
Avoid using too many colloquial terms such as 'hustle and bustle pace.' For an academic essay, more formal language is preferable.
task achievement
You present a clear position on the topic and support your viewpoint with relevant examples, like VNexpress.
coherence/cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with clear paragraphs addressing different points.
task achievement
You highlighted two main reasons—convenience and cost-efficiency—that effectively support your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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