IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

People are surrounded by advertising, which has an increasing effect on our lives. Do you think the positive effects of this outweigh the negative effects?

#people #effect #lives #effects #outweigh
In today's world, with the development of the Internet, the advertising industry is
also
 surrounding us and that plays a crucial role in the buying habits of people. The impact of
advertisement
Add an article
the advertisement
show examples
 has its own corns and pros.
This
 essay will discuss both of two views as to
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
 are far from disadvantages.
To
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the beginning, the advertising industry was good for company
sales
.
For instance
, a company develops a new
product
 and lets people see it by projecting advertisements for the
product
 online and on TV. They learn about the new
product
 and
then
 learn about its functions through the advertisement to decide whether they need it.
This
 increases exposure to customers.
Hence
 the increase, thereby increasing
sales
.
Therefore
, for enterprises, advertising is a way to quickly increase
product
 exposure.
Moreover
, it is a way to let customers quickly know about products, thereby increasing the transaction rate. At the same
time
, it is now filled with a large number of brands for a single
product
. Advertising can serve as a source of information to let people know about various categories, and it can
also
 serve as a guide for consumers to choose products that are more suitable for them.
Therefore
, advertising is a good selection tool for consumers.
On the contrary
, advertising
also
 suffers from
this
 shortcoming. The overwhelming advertising information will cause consumers to make impulse purchases. Some advertisements have a guiding role, to give a clear example, an advertisement will say there are only a few left or a limited
time
 low price sale. During
this
 period, many viewers will lose their rationality and judgment and buy unnecessary goods; at the same
time
, advertisements may
also
 be deceptive, and some businesses will exaggerate the content to the audience,
thus
 misleading the audience to trust the
product
 and spend money. Buy it for its overhyped features.
Overall
, advertising can help us understand
product
 content faster and better, but at the same
time
, some businesses use some means to achieve
sales
,
such
 as exaggeration, limited-
time
sales
, low-price
sales
... But in the long run, advertising has a negative impact on the social economy. It still makes a certain contribution.
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task achievement
Ensure that your essay addresses all parts of the question comprehensively. The essay should discuss both the positive and negative effects of advertising and make a clear stance on whether the positives outweigh the negatives or vice versa.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. For instance, you could mention particular advertising campaigns or industries to illustrate how advertising affects consumer behavior.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical flow by clearly structuring paragraphs. Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and ensure that each sentence logically follows the previous one. This will enhance overall coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen your conclusion. Ensure that it effectively sums up the arguments discussed in the essay and clearly states your final stance on whether the positive effects of advertising outweigh the negative effects.
task achievement
The essay covers both sides of the argument, discussing the benefits and drawbacks of advertising. This balanced approach is crucial for a well-rounded essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets the stage for the discussion and outlines the main points that will be covered.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumer behavior
  • purchasing decisions
  • impulsive buying
  • materialism
  • economic growth
  • competition and innovation
  • personal finances
  • information dissemination
  • misleading information
  • cultural norms
  • societal values
  • diversity
  • social causes
  • stereotypes
  • unrealistic standards
  • psychological effects
  • mental fatigue
  • stress
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