Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is sometimes argued that professionals like
engineers
and doctors should obligated to be
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
in the state, where they studied.
Nonetheless
, there are those who consider that they should be free to
work
in another
country
where they want. In my opinion, workers,
such
as
engineers
and doctors have a right to
work
everywhere, not only in the
country
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
they acquired knowledge.
Firstly
,
this
essay will discuss a requirement for several types of professionals to
work
in the
country
, where they
trained
Add a missing verb
are trained
show examples
and,
secondly
, an independent choice of workers where they
work
.
On the other hand
,
engineers
and doctors have to
work
in the
country
where they graduated. The reason for
this
is that
aim
Correct article usage
the aim
show examples
of governments
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
proliferate special personnel, like
engineers
and clinicians in countries where they
need
Correct pronoun usage
need them
show examples
.
As a result
, a
country
gathers professionals in order to develop themselves and
protects
Correct subject-verb agreement
protect
show examples
a nation from deficiency.
For example
,
according to
the specific laws of the
republic
Capitalize word
Republic
show examples
of Israel, every international applicant, who wants to
enroll
Change the spelling
enrol
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
bachelor
Change noun form
bachelor's
show examples
degree
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
medicine must agree to
work
in Israel after graduation.
However
, it denies
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human rights.
Nevertheless
, any worker
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to decide by
yourself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
where they
work
and I agree with
this
idea.
This
is because of the right
of choosing
Change preposition
to choose
show examples
from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
birth despite any
forcings
Replace the word
forces
show examples
.
Hence
, everyone should confess and respect the rights of people, including where they study,
where
Correct word choice
and where
show examples
they
work
.
For instance
, the government of Germany allocates
scholarship
Fix the agreement mistake
scholarships
show examples
without any requirements for
allcomers
Correct your spelling
all-comers
all comers
around the world who
wants
Correct subject-verb agreement
want
show examples
to be a teacher, an engineer
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
, a
doctor
Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
show examples
. In conclusion, though people may vary in their opinions, I am firmly convinced that employees should be independent, wherever they
work
.
This
is
due to
the fact that opportunity of choice from the nature of
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
.
Submitted by mr.jailybaev on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Work on improving the clarity and accuracy of your language to ensure your ideas are easily understood. This will help in conveying clear, comprehensive ideas.
task achievement
Ensure that you're using specific and relevant examples consistently throughout your essay to support your points.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized, improving the logical flow between paragraphs and within paragraphs could further enhance coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
You could benefit from using more varied and sophisticated vocabulary to better express your nuanced opinions.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your discussion effectively.
task achievement
You provide relevant arguments for both views and your own opinion, fulfilling the task requirements.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: