living in big cities is associated with many problems, what are these problems and how can they be tackled?
nowadays, most of the world's population lives in major
cities
. this
led to the formation of ultra-large cities
with over 10 million residents. although
living in such
large cities
can bring about some benefits including access to better education and healthcare, there are some inevitable problems accompanied which can interfere with our daily life comfort. in the following essay, some of the most prominent issues associated with big city lifestyle will be outlined, and some solutions will be proposed.
the first and most important problem for people
who live in megacities is the poor work-life balance. work-life balance can be defined as the ratio between the time you work per day to the time you spend with your loved ones. many variables can contribute to this
imbalance including long commute times and work hours. take Tehran as an example. most people
leave their houses early in the morning to escape the rush-hour traffic and return home late at night after working for extended hours. This
lack of freedom effectively eliminates the chance of having high-quality leisure time when you can relax and enjoy being with your family members. the solution is for the government
to modify working hours and improve the public transportation system.
one of the other emerging problems in metropolitan areas is air
pollution. it has been recently shown that in the air
we breathe there are small particles, invisible to the naked eye, which can cause respiratory problems such
as asthma and lung cancer. a large proportion of air
pollution in major cities
could be attributed to the widespread use of fossil fuels. the majority of our transportation system
including Fix the agreement mistake
systems
taxies
, buses, and trains are dependent on these non-green sources of energy. fixing Correct your spelling
taxis
this
problem requires several actions involving both people
and government
. people
should learn to limit the usage of their cars and the government
should renew the transportation system with vehicles that use some new and more environmentally friendly sources of energy such
as electricity.
all things considered, living in major cities
is not as delightful as it seems to some people
, and unless some obstacles such
as poor life-work balance and air
pollution are addressed by people
and the government
urgently, the quality of life will start to deteriorate.Submitted by mhmdnekooeian on
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task achievement
The essay generally provides a complete response to the task, addressing both problems and solutions effectively. To improve further, consider expanding on each point with additional examples or data.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is clear, and ideas flow smoothly from one paragraph to the next. For improvement, ensure each paragraph fully focuses on one particular idea without overlapping. For instance, discussing work-life balance solely in one section and pollution in another, as you have done, but adding more depth to each.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to use a variety of cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs more fluidly. For example, transitions like 'Secondly,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In addition' could help further structure your essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt comprehensively by discussing both problems associated with living in big cities and potential solutions.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph is well-organized and addresses a single issue clearly, aiding in the logical flow of the essay.
task achievement
The use of specific examples like Tehran adds depth and relevance to your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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