Some people think that the modern communication technology is having a negative effect on social relationship. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is often said that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
technology
for
communication
is harmful to public
relationships
.
This
writer believes that it is not true
due to
the reason of keeping in touch via social platforms and can be a valuable resource to make new
friends
. It must be understood that that people can talk with their
friends
despite far distance of modern
communication
technology
.
In other words
, people use social media in order to strengthen their
bond
Fix the agreement mistake
bonds
show examples
of
relationships
.
As a consequence
, people can keep in touch thanks to the modern
technology
.
For example
, in Vietnam, many residents use Zalo as a form to get in touch with their
friends
due to
its function of adding
friends
autonomously.
Thus
, social platforms can be a way to keep the relationship among the users. Another point worth considering is that modern
communication
technology
can act as a platform to make new
friends
.
This
means that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
we can spread our
relationships
with new
friends
on the Internet.
As a result
, we can expand our association with the
friends
of our mates. Take Facebook as an example, there is
atask
Correct your spelling
a task
task
that allows us to know the
friends
of our
friends
, so we can expand our association.
Hence
, social media can be a resource for us to make new
friends
. In conclusion, social platforms can play a role in improving
communication
and making new
friends
.
Furthermore
, modern
communication
technology
is not harmful towards public
relationships
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Although the essay presents a clear position, aim to provide a more balanced view by addressing potential counterarguments. This would demonstrate a higher level of critical thinking and task response.
coherence cohesion
There are minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that can affect clarity. Proofreading and making use of complex sentence structures can improve clarity and coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding the writer's standpoint easily.
task achievement
The use of relevant examples, such as Zalo and Facebook, to illustrate points makes the essay convincing and relatable.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: