Some people say that all people should stay in full-time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
There is a common view that individuals should spend all of their time learning until they are a minimum of 18 years old. From my point of view, I strongly agree with
this
idea due to
its positive effects and provide some evidence.
First and foremost, full-time education
allows the young to acquire enough necessary knowledge
for their life
. Specifically, the educational curriculum contains fundamental knowledge
to ensure every student is provided with a basic understanding of the surroundings of their life
, so if the time for education
is not sufficient or students drop off too early, youngsters will lack essential knowledge
, which challenges their daily life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
For instance
, when an adolescent does not participate in adequate physics lessons about electricity, they are unable to resolve some simple problems about electricity in their house, or they are even likely to cause accidents and injure themselves.
In addition
, it is education
that the young should focus on, rather than any other fields at the early stage of their life
. The justification for this
point is that plenty of juveniles are not experienced enough to identify their own strengths, weaknesses, and preferences, so it is difficult for them to decide their career path. Therefore
, having a comprehensive perspective about various subjects is conducive to their search for their potential. A prime illustration of this
point is that students may find their deep interest in Natural Science instead
of Social Science after a prolonged approach to both of them, so they opt to pursue a suitable career path, which is related to Natural Science.
To conclude
, it is mandatory for the youth to receive full-time education
because of its provision of essential knowledge
and assistance in students choosing a suitable career path. Only by full-time education
can the young’s life
be improved.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt by outlining clear arguments for why full-time education until age 18 is beneficial. However, providing a counterargument could add depth to your discussion and demonstrate a more balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
Some of your sentences are quite complex. Be cautious of overcomplicating your ideas as this may affect clarity. Simplifying some sentences could enhance comprehension.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This aids in the essay’s readability and overall coherence.
task achievement
Your examples effectively support your main points, such as the importance of understanding physics and the role of education in career decisions.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the topic and provides a complete response. This indicates a strong ability to develop and extend ideas.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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