In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?

In the era of fast-paced lives, at the centre of technology lies the cellphones which are accessible for every society. Inevitably, daily purchases using mobile phones are gradually becoming famous among people which are absolutely advantageous from many perspectives, both by the means of saving a significant amount of time , and the ease of finding and paying for your target buy just with a few push of buttons.
Firstly
, The idea of making transactions using online banking applications has become so common which has shed light on saving a lot of productive hours.
For instance
, by pointing out the amount of time being wasted
while
waiting in queues of banks, to send just a few bucks , we can understand how helpful the banking applications are.
Secondly
, another merit of having online purchases is the variety of user-friendly applications to choose between and making effortless bargains , in comparison to physical stores. Taking a quick look at clothes shopping , the ease of looking for your desired goods with setting the exact size, colour , texture and even brand on ,is
literall
Correct your spelling
literally
incomparable to before when searching for hours in malls .
As a result
, people are more eager to
do
Correct your spelling
go
show examples
shopping on mobile phones . In conclusion, the merits of purchasing on the Internet override the shortcomings. As mentioned the two most obvious advantages of
this
modern-day technology , people are
following
this
trend because of saving time in either transactions or buying on websites .
Also
, the process of finding and making payments is totally effortless and user-friendly.
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Work on improving the clarity of your main points. Your ideas are good, but sometimes they lack clear connection and elaboration. Try to provide more detailed explanations and examples for each point.
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Ensure that your examples are more relevant and specific. For instance, when discussing the advantages of mobile applications, you could give precise examples of applications that offer these benefits.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between your paragraphs. Use connecting words and phrases to link your ideas more smoothly.
general advice
Try to reduce minor grammatical errors and refine your choice of vocabulary to make your essay more fluent and professional-sounding.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly sets up the topic and outlines your view, making it easy for the reader to understand your stance.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay and reinforces your opinion.
supported main points
The essay provides relevant real-life scenarios that readers can relate to, such as the convenience of online banking and shopping.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenience
  • safety
  • security
  • time-saving
  • cashless transactions
  • dependence on technology
  • privacy concerns
  • accessibility issues
  • financial vulnerability
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