Nowadays many people work part or full time from home. Some people say that working from home has many benefits while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Working from the house has become a phenomenon in the technological digital era that was a consequence of a specific recent epidemic, which, some people believe, would generate plenty of benefits.
Conversely
, the rest hold the opposite rationale that I firmly agree with.
To begin
, there are various beneficial returns from working from home.
Firstly
, employees could schedule their timeline plans in an optimal way to achieve the most effective times, stimulating them to pursue a few of the target purposes in a specific period.
For example
,
this
flexible timeline allows them to self-study or do additional part-time tasks in their free moment, accumulating more experience or professional knowledge, before climbing to higher positions.
Besides
, workers can design their personal office environment in any way they like, removing background noise and external distractions, leading to higher productivity.
Secondly
, these staff save time, energy and commuting fees at house and workplace,
while
the business holders could save the rental fees.
Hence
, workforces could spend movement duration for themselves and time with their families, contributing to a work-life balance condition.
Nevertheless
, there are some disadvantages of working from home.
Initially
, people could miss out on the collective energy of the office, leading to lower performance
due to
the fact that people could feel fatigued, bored, distracted and less disciplined. Individuals could be easily distracted by some multimedia content on web-based platforms, which results in delaying urgent projects and generates many problems.
For instance
, working from the house can blur the boundaries between our private and professional lives, imbalanced work-life conditions and feeling more fatigued.
As a result
, all the stress accumulated during the working day often makes it difficult to wind down at accommodation.
In contrast
, in workplace ambience, interaction with optimistic and high-energizers could spread
this
power to their surrounding colleagues. Some senior excellent staff could help their junior fellows solve some difficult tasks by guiding visual instruction on the graphic screen to complete
this
task on time.
Furthermore
, face-to-face interaction with co-workers and bosses is irreplaceable, which could solve a feeling of isolation and loneliness.
To conclude
, both of these aforementioned factors are justifiable. From my perspective, I still reject working from home because the fragile border between work and personal life could deteriorate my living standards.
Submitted by lenam2k1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
You presented a clear opinion and addressed both views of the topic effectively. However, it's important to elaborate more on your own perspective and back it up with additional specific examples and arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work a bit more on the conclusion. Restate the main points and your opinion clearly, without introducing new ideas. This will make your conclusion stronger.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all paragraphs are interconnected smoothly. Although your transitions are generally clear, occasionally they can feel abrupt. Linking phrases can be beneficial.
coherence cohesion
You have a well-structured essay with clear paragraphs. Both the introduction and conclusion are evident and align with the task.
coherence cohesion
You used a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary, which made the essay engaging. This is great for showing your range of language skills.
task achievement
You provided some relevant and specific examples to support your points. This strengthens your arguments and shows your ability to provide evidence.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: