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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market.

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market.
#show #japanese #tourists #australia #tourist #market
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Given are two charts providing a comparison of
Japanese
 tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995,
as well as
 the certain
percentages
 of
Japanese
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
 visiting Australia. It can be inferred from the illustration that the number of
Japanese
 tourists travelling abroad climbed steadily from 5
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 people in 1985 to approximately 11
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 1990. But in 1991, the
Japanese
Correct quantifier usage
number of Japanese
show examples
travellers
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 steadily to 10.5
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. Before soaring to a staggering 15
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 in 1995, the number of
travellers
 remained stable between 1992 and 1994 with 13
million
travellers
. It is
also
 interesting to note that only 2
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 out of 5
million
travellers
 in 1985 went to Australia. The
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Japanese
 tourists in
Australi
Correct your spelling
Australia
show examples
 went up steadily to 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 from 9.5
million
 in 1989.
However
, in 1990, the
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 slipped to approximately 4.2
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. By far the highest
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 of
Japanese
 visited Australia in 1994 with 6.2
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 13.5
million
 people,
by contrast
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
last
 year, the
percentages
Fix the agreement mistake
percentage
show examples
 dropped steadily to 6
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 out of 15
million
travellers
.
Submitted by shani.menglieva.94 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words japanese, percentages, millions, travellers, million, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • tourist market
  • overseas travel
  • tourism industry
  • international campaigns
  • economic prosperity
  • travel preferences
  • market share
  • fluctuations
  • peak
  • trend
  • attracting
  • destination
  • variability
  • contributing factors
  • currency exchange rates
  • speculate
  • tourism policies
  • competitive markets
  • popularity
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