Immigration has a major impact on society. What are the main reasons for immigration? What consequences can it have on people who migrate to other countries?

Immigration - a trend as old as human history itself, has always been a major phenomenon in
society
.
People
migrate for a variety of reasons including the expectations of a better education and career, to avoid political turmoil and war, and to be surrounded by a safety net of a developed
society
. Migration has both positive and negative results for
people
who migrate to a foreign land.
To begin
with, the primary reasons for
people
to decide to migrate to other
countries
, the most obvious reasons are education and a better career. Millions of students get admitted to different foreign universities so that they can get a better education and have more demand in the job market.
Similarly
, thousands of skilled, semi-skilled and non-skilled
people
migreate
Correct your spelling
migrate
migrated
to a
country
with a relatively stable economy with the hope to get a decent job and earn a better wage than what their homeland would probably have offered.
Moreover
,
policitical
Correct your spelling
political
unrest, civil war and poor social safety net force
people
to leave their own
country
and take shelter in a land
that is
completely foreign to them.
For instance
, thousands of
people
from Syria migrated to different European
countries
to avoid wars and casualties, and to be in a
country
that can offer them social safety. Those immigrants get many benefits from migrating.
For instance
, they live in a better
society
, can avoid wars, and poor social and political conditions of their home
country
and get to blend in a developed
country
that has a better standard of life.
For instance
, many
people
who have fled the wartorn
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
of Iraq, Syria, Sudan or Afghanistan, have been accepted to live and work in developed
countries
like Germany and Poland, which
ave
Correct your spelling
have
show examples
improved their living
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
and social security.
On the contrary
, migrants may face some negative consequences
as a result
of their migration. Language and cultural barriers are perhaps the most dominant of them. After migrating to a new
country
, which is often quite a contrast from their
country
of origin, they find it difficult to communicate and blend into the host
society
.
Consequenty
Correct your spelling
Consequently
, they struggle to get a job and suffer from distress and depression. In conclusion, migration has always been a part of our
society
and civilisation. It is expected that
people
would migrate on their will and not
forced
Add a missing verb
be forced
show examples
to do so for events like wars. It is
also
expected that the host
countries
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
take more initiatives to reduce the negative experiences of those migrants.
Submitted by sejal.h on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
There are a few spelling errors and minor grammatical mistakes like misplacement of words (e.g., 'migreate' instead of 'migrate') and typos (e.g., 'policitical' instead of 'political'). Paying attention to such details will improve the readability of your essay.
structure
While the essay is generally well-structured, ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence followed by coherent supporting sentences will further strengthen your argument. Avoid minor repetitions such as mentioning 'a better career' several times without adding new information.
skills
The introduction and conclusion are very well-written, providing a clear understanding of the topic and summarizing the main points effectively.
content
The essay gives relevant and specific examples, such as the situation in Syria and how migration to countries like Germany and Poland has improved people's lives.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: