Some people believe that preserving the natural environment is vital, whereas, most make no effort to do so. Why do you think this is happening? What are some simple actions that could help the environment?

There is a controversy over the matter of whether the natural
environment
should be conserved or not. A group of people believe that the current generation is not responsible for the preservation of the
environment
;
however
, the other group of individuals assert that any
kinds
Fix the agreement mistake
kind
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of irresponsibility against the protection and maintenance of natural
resources
will lead to harmful results for the future generation. In the case of the first belief, natural
resources
are assumed to be endless and inconsiderate use of these
resources
would not lead to any problems. Indeed,
according to
this
belief, natural
resources
and the
environment
are made to serve human beings.
This
attitude is the result of
malfunction
Add an article
a malfunction
show examples
in education and can be prevented
through
Change preposition
by
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upgrading educational methods and curricula. As a potential solution,
for instance
, governments can consider some subjects
complied
Wrong verb form
comply
show examples
with environmental concerns;
consequently
, pupils will implicitly recognize their roles in preserving the earth and its nature.
In contrast
, many individuals affirm that the earth and its natural
resources
are a precious heritage that has been donated to human beings.
Therefore
,
according to
this
notion, the
environment
must be protected and conserved for our children and grandchildren the way our ancestors kept the earth and its
resources
. Climate change,
for example
, is causing a crisis these days as humans are burning fossil fuels which has led to global warming during the past few decades. In conclusion, considering the above-mentioned points, I am inclined to believe that,
although
there are groups of people who do not care about the status of the natural
environment
and do not strive to protect it, the other groups, who are supporters of preserving the
environment
, must help schools and governments to raise awareness among pupils, who will be the preservers of the
environment
in the future.
Submitted by mojgan.sobhani on

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task achievement
While the essay covers the prompt effectively, the relevance and specificity of examples could be improved. For example, you might provide concrete instances of individuals or organizations making a difference through simple actions.
task achievement
Ensure all points are equally balanced. The essay leans more towards discussing the reasons for irresponsible behavior than providing solutions. A more balanced approach would strengthen the task response.
coherence cohesion
Include a clearer map of the essay in the introduction. Although the main points are clear, a succinct statement outlining the structure of your essay would improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
Use more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your arguments. This will enhance coherence and make your points more seamless.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is strong; the points follow a clear and logical progression.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a well-crafted introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your main arguments.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported with sound reasoning and examples, enhancing the overall argument.
task achievement
The ideas presented are clear and comprehensive, addressing both the reasons behind the issue and potential solutions.

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