Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children while others claim it has a positive effects for children as they grow up . Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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A plethora of individuals assume that watching TV has an adverse effect on infants

whereas

Linking Words

may put forward propositions that it has numerous beneficial impacts on their personal growth.

While

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there are compelling arguments for the latter sentiment, from my own perspective, the detrimental impact on offspring makes more sense. One reason why watching technological devices is disadvantageous is that a large number of juveniles can run a higher risk of short-sightedness. First of all, supporters of

this

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viewpoint claim that

this

Linking Words

action encourages a sedentary lifestyle for youngsters and

consequently

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that they experience high levels of an inactive person

as well as

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are predicted to be addicted to

this

Linking Words

due to

Linking Words

the fact of the mass appeal of vibrant colours on screen.

As a result

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, of sociable

activities

Add a comma

activities,

show examples

adolescents can turn a blind eye and lead to unhealthy lifestyles. For these reasons,

such

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parents

Use synonyms

must realize that it is going to have adverse effects on their toddlers.

On the other hand

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, others agree that it is a beneficial factor that contributes to personal growth. For one thing, it is a fact that children can be educated with a huge amount of knowledge through various and vibrant images

as well as

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basic words and catchy melodies in music songs that teenagers have the ability to imitate easily.

For example

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, the channel Pinkfong produces a wide range of music songs containing meaningful acquaintances to educate children,

therefore

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, it is

also

Linking Words

a memorable memory gets on with childhood. Numerous

parents

Use synonyms

tend to teach their infants through technological devices owing to the fact that they hold the belief that youth can absorb foreign languages during childhood. To recapitulate,

although

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there are controversial perspectives determining whether

parents

Use synonyms

give their adolescents access to high-tech devices, I think that watching TV not only has an adverse effect on offspring

on the contrary

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also

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fosters an inactive lifestyle.

However

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, providing that

parents

Use synonyms

allocate suitable schedules for infants to entertain can broaden their horizons.

Submitted by [email protected] on Wed Jun 12 2024

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task achievement

The argumentation is clear and covers both views, but addressing counter-arguments directly would strengthen the essay.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to enhance overall readability.

task achievement

Provide additional examples and evidence to bolster the main points.

coherence cohesion

Work on syntax variety and sentence complexity for better cohesion and coherence.

task achievement

You have successfully presented both sides of the argument, showcasing a balanced view.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your discussion and provide a clear stance.

task achievement

Use of specific channels and examples, like Pinkfong, adds credibility and specificity to your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

326 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary behavior
unrealistic perceptions
creative pursuits
social development
emotional development
constructive content
screen time
parental guidance
critical thinking
active learning
age-appropriate
media literacy
family bonding
moderation
perceive

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Some people believe that watching TV is bad for children while others claim it has a positive effects for children as they grow up . Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

some people think that social media sites have a huge negative effect on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Famous sportsmen earn a lot more money than those in other professions. Although sport is important in our lives, everyone should be equal and such big incomes of sport professionals are unjustified. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Everyone should adopt a vegetarian diet because eating meat can cause serious health problems. Do you agree or disagree?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dress code. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?